


Bad Moon Rising

by jesbakescookies



Category: Good Girls (TV), Groundhog Day (1993)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Time Travel, Angst with a Happy Ending, Beth has a terrible horrible no good very bad day, Drama, F/M, Fix-It, Groundhog Day, Happy death day genre, History Repeating Itself, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Inspired by Groundhog Day, Romance, Suicide Attempt, Time Loop, Time Shenanigans, Time Travel Fix-It, livedierepeat
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-02
Updated: 2021-02-02
Packaged: 2021-02-27 22:41:29
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 4
Words: 26,736
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22863442
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jesbakescookies/pseuds/jesbakescookies
Summary: Beth finds herself reliving the worst day of her life. Is her fate set in stone or can she change the day’s tragic outcome?*reposting in celebration of groundhogs day😁
Relationships: Beth Boland/Rio
Comments: 47
Kudos: 401





	1. Chapter 1

* * *

_I see a bad moon a-rising_

_I see trouble on the way_

_I see earthquakes and lightnin'_

_I see bad times today_

_Don't go 'round tonight_

_It's bound to take your life_

_There's a bad moon on the rise_

Beth jabbed her phone screen angrily, her head still buried under her pillow as she quieted her alarm. Squinting at the device to read the time, she tried to remember ever setting her phone to play such an ominous song. 

_4:00am, Monday, September 18_

Pushing herself upright, she began her day with the usual bathroom activities. The shower rattled on, the pipes groaning a moment before bursting forth with icy water. Beth glared at the shower head until it finally warmed up to something tolerable.

"Remind Dean to get the water heater checked out." She muttered under her breath, while washing her hair quick and efficiently. Soon she was drying off and then applying her favorite lotion. She finished up and headed towards her bedroom only to trip over the rumpled bathmat. Beth gasped as she caught herself from falling, bracing her hand on the mirror affixed to the back of her bathroom door. Splintering cracks feathered out below her palm, the mirror cracking in hairline fractures up its surface.

"Shit." She muttered, slowly pulling her hand away to see a small cut on her palm.

Beth cleaned the tiny wound quickly, while muttering yet another reminder for Dean. "Replace the bathroom mirror."

She dressed casually for the morning before shuffling off to the kitchen to prepare for her visitors. It wasn’t everyday that one confessed to murder to the FBI. It called for her most tried and true recipes.

* * *

  
  


"The croissants are filled with chocolate-hazelnut, and that's streusel with Saigon cinnamon and burnt orange morning roll." Beth waved a hand over the table of sweet confections she appropriately tagged on her instagram, #ToDieFor.

"No buckle?" Turner referenced their previous conversation, his tone dry and unamused at her presentation.

"Not today." Beth replied, her red lips pulling into her best P.T.A smile. "Don't be shy!"

"Whenever you're ready, Mrs. Boland."

Beth had everything she was going to say planned, every possible answer for every possible question. She knew what she had to do but her lips paused for what felt like an eternity before she forced the words out.

"My name is Elizabeth Irene Boland. And this is how I murdered Leslie Peterson."

* * *

  
  
  
"So who's the new manager? Whoever it is, he's phoning it in. Nana got sold a yogurt from September. No way he's rotating the milk." Boomer’s voice was an annoying droll in Beth’s mind, the weaselly little shit sitting across from them like he wasn’t ruining their lives.

"We are being charged with your murder, you piece of..." Annie growled, sitting forward slightly before leaning back as Miriam entered the dining room.

"Would anyone like a soft drink? Girls?" Miriam asked as she shuffled in with a tray of cookies.

"No, thank you." The girls replied stiffly, all three of them perched to continue the conversation as quickly as possibly.

"I'll have a Tab." Boomer flashed his grandmother a smile. Beth felt her fist tightening with the urge to break another bottle of whiskey over his ginger head. She shoved the urge away and whipped her phone out of her pocket. She began dialing the number she’d memorized off Turner’s business card.

"What are you doing?" He exclaimed, reaching towards her phone.

"Calling the cops and telling them that you're alive." She spoke matter of factly, her eyes not even rising as he began stuttering.

"You can't do that."

"Watch." She growled back, her blue eyes blazing with frustration. Everything always seemed to be against her and she was sick of it.

"They'll kill me."

"The cops?" Beth raised an eyebrow in surprise.

"The gang!" His mustache was twitching anxiously.

"Screw this fool!" Ruby exclaimed while leaning forward to jab a finger in his direction. ”You're gonna go in there, you're gonna show them your new Flavor Savor, and you're gonna tell them you've never been better."

"Oh... Oh yeah, okay." Boomer mocked, nodding his head as if to pacify them.

"Yeah, 'cause we're not about to go down for your sorry ass." Annie crossed her arms tightly over her chest.

"Then I'll tell them about the other sorry ass." Boomer drawled, his eyebrows raised and smile curling his lips.

"What other sorry ass?" Beth was shaking her head as he grinned.

"The one in the trash bag." He replied evenly, pausing as his grandmother set a glass of soda down in front of him. "I'm gonna need a straw, nana."

When she exited the room he continued, "I saw how you threw him in the back of a minivan like a wet dog."

"How?" Annie scoffed, throwing a hand up in frustration.

"I hid out behind Mary Pat's. Lived off the land. You can drink your own urine till it's brown." Boomer explained, his expression laced with pride.

"You were like 100 yards from a 7-Eleven." Ruby’s face screwed up in disgust at his statement.

"They have cameras."

"I'm sorry." Annie said mockingly. "So that's your plan? You're gonna hole up like Anne Frank up there for the rest of your life?"

"No." Boomer smirked, leaning forward as though sharing a secret. "There's a surgeon in Tampa. Does full facial reconstruction. He's the only guy Escobar would ever use. It's like witness protection, but only better. You know, I get a new face, I get to start over."

"That's the dumbest thing I've ever heard." Annie glanced at Beth who was seconds from slapping the man across the face. She was exhausted by the back and forth, the push and pull of every single problem that seemed to always pile up around her. If she could rewind time, she’d go back and hand Boomer and Mary Pat over to Rio.

"I want my life back, okay? You know, whatever. What do you care?" He asked before murmuring to Miriam as she gave him a straw. "Thank you."

"How much?" Beth muttered.

"All of it. Nose, cheekbones, jaw. Nana, get my vision board.."

"Which one?" She was moving towards the closet as she spoke. "The girls or the cards?"

Boomer scoffed at her question, "The face one."

"How much does it cost?" Beth snapped, her patience for all things Boomer coming to a end.

"No!" Ruby screeched, slamming her hand on the table in frustration.

"You couldn't afford it." Boomer smarmy smile turned her guts.

"Neither can you." Beth countered evenly, a fire brewing in her chest at the idea of handing over another dollar to someone who didn’t deserve it. She couldn’t ever get ahead.

"We are not going down this road again. We're gonna buy him a new face and he's going to ghost us. Again." Ruby was furious next to her. 

"First you show cops old face." Beth spoke firmly, nodding her head.

"First you show me money." Boomer crossed his arms over his plaid pajamas.

"Well, who are you even going for?" Annie asked, her eyebrows raised high and curious.

"Rupert Grint."

"The ginger from Harry Potter?" Ruby scoffed.

"Yes, the doctor said he's closest to my bone structure. You know what? It's not that far off." Boomer exclaimed. "Where is she with the vision board? Nana!"

"Jesus Christ." Annie muttered, her eyes wide and disturbed.

Beth rubbed her temples tiredly. She was so over everything.

* * *

After frantically knocking for more than an acceptable time, Beth found her way into Rio’s loft through the fire escape. Again. Only it was barren, every mid-century modern console table and cashmere sweater gone.

Her pocket began to buzz the moment she entered the vacant living room.

"Hi." Beth spoke cautiously, the number flashing blocked on her caller id.

"Hey." Rio’s voice was a low rumble in her ear, the familiar sensation of hearing it running through her body. A steady thrumming that started at the base of her neck and buzzed down her spine to settle into a slow growing heat between her thighs. She shifted her weight from one foot to the other, squeezing her legs together at the throb he caused.

"How are you?" She croaked, her eyes fluttering a bit at the flush taking over her body.

"What's going on?" He drawled, the gravel in his words only igniting her need further.

"Your neighbors said you moved out." Beth replied softly, her feet pacing the empty loft. It felt so cold and desolate without Rio’s things. The hollow click of her heeled boots echoing off exposed brick and tall windows.

"Yeah, something like that." Rio spoke easily, the anger barely trickling into his tone.

"Where'd you go this time? Epcot? Six Flags?" She asked coyly, her words only slightly sarcastic and bitter.

"What do you want, Elizabeth?" His voice turned harder as he became fed up with her small talk.

"I need some money again." She sighed, her hand tightening around the phone as she felt shame paint her cheeks. Beth was tired of needing help, she hated asking for it from anyone but especially Rio. The embarrassment was almost cripplingly.

"I gave you the keys to the kingdom." He sounded bored, almost distracted by the familiar conversation.

"I know."

"But you didn't want ‘em."

"If I could ask anyone but you, I would. I'm in real trouble, all right?"

"That Fed's got a real hard-on for you, huh?"

"Not the good kind." Beth said jokingly, pacing the loft, her finger tracing the countertop. She couldn’t help but think of what a _good kind_ was. Flashes of Rio pinning her against a bar bathroom, his hips grinding between her thighs. Fast and hard. The way his skin glowed in the afternoon sunlight filtering through her patio doors. That time moved just as hungry but lasted so much longer, fingertips tracing curves, lips tasting every inch.

"Thing is, I'm a little dry right now. You know how it is." He was speaking but her eyes were on the kitchen island, her mind playing through a filthy scene of Rio spreading her out across it like a thanksgiving feast. His head buried between her thighs. His tongue lapping at her core like a hungry animal. 

"What are you doing?" Rio rumbled in her ear, pulling her back from the edge of an erotic downward spiral. She could feel the slickness in her panties, her core clenching at the images still burning behind her eye lids.

"What do you mean?" She murmured, her words breathy as she turned away from the kitchen to push the fantasy from her mind.

"I mean, right now. What are you doing?" Rio asked, his voice sending shivers down her spine.

"Nothing." She replied, a lie spilling out of her mouth as she paced again. "Just getting my hair cut."

"Don't." The word was gruffer than the others and brought her feet to a halt, her fingers rising to twirl the ends of her strawberry blonde locks. "What?"

"Don't cut it." He expanded, his voice turning smoother and rougher within the same sentence.

"It's just a little trim." Her own voice became soft, her cheeks flaming at his demand, as though he cared what she looked like. His next words hitched her lungs, stuttering her steps to a halt again.

"I like pushing it out of your face."

Beth couldn’t help but simulate the sensation of him doing just that, her fingertips tucking a stray strand behind her ear as her eyes slipped closed. She hated that she missed him, hated even more that she was responsible for his absence.   
  
"Yeah, just like that." He drawled deeply, the wantonness catching her as much as the connotation. He was watching her at that very moment. Her eyes scanned the loft until she found a camera up high in the beams.

"Ahh, you got me." Rio drawled, his annoying smirk coming through the phone. "So listen, I wish I could help."

"You could. You choose not to." She snapped, her hand tightening into a fist as her cheeks burned with anger.

"Ah, don't be like that, Elizabeth."

She hated that he always had the upper hand. No matter what the situation, he was always towering over her. She glared at the camera with the phone dropping to her side, hoping beyond hope that he couldn’t see glassiness of her eyes.

She was on her own. Like always.

_  
"Is that all I am? work."_

_-"Yeah, pretty much."_

_"That’s it?"_

_-"That’s it."_

* * *

It was an oldie but a goodie, Beth figured armed robbery had worked for them before. Why not up the ante and case a bank? What could go wrong?

"It's a suicide mission." Ruby muttered incredulously.

"It worked." Beth explained, picking up a cardboard coaster. "So this guy would go to a bar, order a beer, order lunch like a burger, awesome blossom, whatever and then he would take a coaster, put it on the top of his glass like he was going to the bathroom or something."

Pausing mid story, she motioned to the waitress. "Excuse me! I'm sorry. Could we get some ketchup?"

As she left, Beth continued, "Then he would rob the place, come back with a bag of cash, enjoy the game and, like, finish his lunch."

Ruby looked far from convinced, and really Beth figured she should be wary. Most of her plans turned to shit but really what choice did they have.

"Stupid is what it is."

"It's kind of a perfect alibi." Beth smirked before popping a french fry into her mouth.

"Not if he was on "20/20" talking about how he got caught."

"What do you want to do?" Beth huffed, throwing her hand up in frustration.

"Call the cops on that weaselly little bitch." Ruby snapped, her patience wearing thin.

"Okay." Beth spoke plainly, her eyebrows raised.

Ruby looked surprised but copied her response. "Okay."

"Okay and then he, um, tells 'em about Jeff and they dig him out of my front yard." Beth shrugged, her eyes returning to the game on the tv. She knew her best friend would agree to it, but knew it would take a bit to get her to follow her lead.

"We do this, we're straight up hoodlums." Ruby grumbled, sipping her sweet tea.

"I hear you, but... Jeff"

"It's insane!" Ruby hissed under her breath as he waitress dropped off the ketchup bottle. 

"Thank you." Beth gave her a sweet smile before glancing at Ruby with a single word in response. " _Jeff_."

"We didn't kill him." Ruby muttered, picking up a French fry.

Beth stopped the waitress again, solidifying their future alibi just a little bit more by being a memorable pain in the ass customer. "Excuse me. I'm sorry. Can we also get a side of ranch? "

"Ooh, yes. Ranch." Ruby moaned mid chew, her eyes bright.

"Thanks." Beth smiled congenially at the irritated waitress, her eyes moving to Ruby as she walked away. "But Turner will make it look like we did."

"Couple of cameras, one security guard." Annie spoke blandly while chewing a French fry when she joined them seconds later. "Everybody is old. I'm not talking Liam Neeson old, I'm talking, like, Benjamin Button old."

Beth cocked and eyebrow, silently waiting for Ruby to give in.

"I mean, like, little. Like I mean I could take them, you know? Honestly, I'm not sure why we waited so long.... Who's winning?"

"Who cares?" Ruby muttered, gulping the rest of her drink down. Beth smirked, her eyes lighting up. "I know we can do it. Everything’s gonna be fine."  
  
  


* * *

They ate while talking over their plan, all three drinking away the stress.

"What do you keep humming?" Beth slurred later that evening in the uber they all shared.

"I don’t know." Annie murmured, "I heard it in the bank and can’t get it..." she hiccuped several times. "Outta my head."

"It’s Creedence." The driver replied without looking back. "Bad Moon Rising."

"Like, the arms wide open guy?" Annie asked with a wrinkled brow, her arms stretched out across the backseat in front of the other women.

Beth giggles, "No. God Annie. That’s Creed."

"What? How do I know who what he said it is?"

"You’re drunk." Ruby murmured, leaning against the window. "Just stop talking."

"I’m just saying."

"Stop saying."

"You stop saying, lady."

"Both of you stop saying." Beth scolded, rolling her eyes at the driver in the mirror. "No arguing when the car’s moving."

* * *

"Excuse me." Beth smiled widely at the familiar waitress. "Hi, um, they're in the bathroom but, um I can order. She's going to have the black bean burger, and she'll have the chicken quesadilla."

With a nod, the waitress left Beth to nervously watch the bank across the street. Eventually the television pulled her attention away from the front window, the words kickstarting her heart.

_Our kingdom is fully stocked and ready to serve your needs. We offer wholesale pricing. So why sleep like a pauper when you can sleep like a king?_

_Come visit Detroit's premiere mattress store and we'll give you the keys to the kingdom._

_  
  
_

* * *

It was all there. Every single stick of furniture and bright green artwork from Rio’s loft. Every single faux dollar bill and roll of wrapping paper had been returned to the storage unit in her name.

"It's like $400 cashmere." Ruby gasped, her fingers combing over the lush fabric.

"All in my name." Beth commented, as the girls thumbed through clothing and stacks of money.

"Why?" Ruby’s eyes were wide and mouth falling open. "Think I can take some for Stan?"

Beth shrugged, nodding her head as she crossed her arms and surveyed the storage units open in front of them.

"So where is he?" Ruby asked, her arms loaded up with sweaters.

"Who is he?" She huffed, feeling at a total loss as to what it all meant. Had everything been a lie? Had it truly only ever been work, a long-con to make her the scapegoat for everything. Payback for getting him arrested all those months ago.

_"Are you gonna kill me?"_

_-"Nah. I’m gonna teach you."_

Well, she was finally learning her lesson. She didn’t know anything about Rio, who he was, where he was or what his motivations were.

  
  


* * *

"It's not Photoshopped."

Boomer looked at the pictures of pallets of money in the storage units. "Where is it?

"Dequinder and McNichols." Beth grit her teeth as he continued to squint at the screen.

"Where?"

"In a storage unit."

Boomer held out his hand in their direction, his eyebrows raised as he waited.

"Nobody's gonna low five you, dick." Annie scoffed, leaning back in her chair.

"Give me the key." Boomer pushed the phone towards them, his arms crossing over his chest.

"After you go in to the cops." Beth retorted.

"Oh, I'll go in." Boomer nodded at the statement, but his lip curled cruelly.

"Yeah, you will."

"After I get the key." Boomer snapped, his hand out again as though they would even consider it. Beth ground her teeth together as they argued back and forth for a solid half hour before Boomer kicked them out.

They were stuck between a blackmailing weasel and a strong arming gang leader, while surrounded by the FBI. Beth couldn’t understand how this became her life.

* * *

"I got you tickets to Bey." Beth informed, holding out the concert tickets to a Ruby while they drank on her back porch. "Happy birthday."

"It's not for two months." Ruby looked down at the tickets before her eyes rose to Beth’s.

"Surprise!"

"Are you trying to age me?" Ruby sounded skeptical, her brow furrowed as Beth shrugged nonchalantly. She hadn’t been too sure that she would tell Ruby her plan to confess to the murder but now that she sat next to her longest and truest friend, she couldn’t not.

"Take Stan, okay?" Beth sipped her drink, her gaze on the backyard and starry sky.

"What if he's in jail?" Her voice trembled a bit at the mere idea of it.

"He won't be." Beth croaked, clearing her throat to confess her next move.

"How do you know?"

Beth took a gulp of her alcohol before speaking. "Cause he's going to take that deal. It's my fault."

"Okay, I'm cutting you off." Ruby plucked the glass from Beth’s hand, setting it aside with a scowl.

"I'm turning myself in." Beth explained, her tone final.

Ruby raised her eyebrows in confusion and spoke cautiously. "Okay?"

"Why should it be you or Annie?" Beth shrugged heavily, her throat tightening. "I made you do it. Can I have my drink back?"

"Made us?" Ruby scoffed, her expression turning sour. "Which part? "

"The store, the money, Jeff, all of it. Take your pick." Beth held her hand out for the drink so rudely taken from her.

Ruby ignored her reaching and retorted. "We could've said no."

"But you never say no." Beth sighed, tucking hair behind her ears.

"I am not your yes man."

"No, you're a really good friend." Beth quipped, her head cocking to the side in thought. "Do you think she'll open with "Single Ladies"?"

"This is crazy." Ruby’s eyes were blurry but she still replied. "No, that'd be an encore. I'm not gonna let you."

"Then we all go down." She muttered, adjusting the knit blanket they shared to cover her legs better. "And what is that? That's stupid?"

"So now I'm stupid?"

"Shut up." Beth scoffed, her hand out making grabby motions. "Can I have my drink?"

* * *

  
  


She’d stayed at Ruby until almost midnight, both women taking time they figured were their last to enjoy each other’s company. When the alcohol had them sleepy, and they planning of the following day complete, Beth ordered an Uber to take her home. She was sitting in the backseat feeling drowsy but clearheaded, her mind rolling through everything she needed to do to get ready for the following days. How did one prepare to confess to a crime they didn’t commit? What kind of crazy checklist needed to be completed when throwing yourself on a live grenade to stop the lives of the ones you loved from being blown to hell? Music from the staticky speakers finally interrupted her plotting, the song seeming to follow her everywhere.

_There's a bad moon on the rise_

_I hope you got your things together_

_I hope you are quite prepared to die_

_Look's like we're in for nasty weather_

_One eye is taken for an eye_

_Oh don't go 'round tonight_

_It's bound to take your life_

_There's a bad moon on the rise_

_There's a bad moon on the rise_

"Can you shut that off please?" Beth complained, as she drunkenly stared out the window. "I hate that song."

* * *

  
  


"Ow! Too hard!" Jane squeaked as Beth hugged her fiercely. She knew these were her last moments before everything her kids thought they knew about their mother was destroyed. Soon she would be a confessed murderer and the innocent veil that her kids wore would be torn from their eyes. Soon everyone would know she wasn’t who she said she was. 

"Well, you're just too delicious." Beth choked on the words, her lips pressing firmly to her daughter’s temple.

"What's, uh, what's on tap for you today?" Dean asked, looking her over curiously. She wasn’t sure if he was reading the dread that had settled in her body overnight or if he was just trying to plan his day.

"The usual." Beth smiled without it touching her eyes, her gaze following the kids as they gathered they’re book bags and lunch sacks.

"Hmm, you made enough for an army." Dean looked over the giant platters of desserts she slaved over all morning.

"Book club." Beth replied evenly, a tiny smile curling her lips as she ushered them towards the door. She needed to clean up and change before her special guests arrived. She wasn’t going to go to jail looking anything less than put together.

"All right, let's go, people." Dean clapped his hands. "Let's go. Move out! Chop chop, chop chop."

"Dean." Beth croaked, clearing her throat as she wrapped her arms around her stomach anxiously. "You look nice."

Dean starred at her a moment in confusion before smiling softly. "See you later?"

She wasn’t sure if he was sensing the soon to be end of everything they had but she revealed nothing in return. "Yup."

"All right, let's go." Dean replied, herding the kids out of the house, leaving Beth on her own. She stared at the closed door for a solid minute before heading to her bedroom, her mind already running through her wardrobe options.

* * *

_"And then I backed my car over him. And I wrapped him in a tarp."_

_  
-"Officer Hill said in his affidavit this morning that you put the body in the freezer."_

_"Does it matter?"_

_  
-"I'm afraid it does. How did you fit the body in the freezer?"_

_  
"You know those electric knives, the ones you use at Thanksgiving?"_

_  
  
_

* * *

The confession went as well as to be expected and the car ride over to the police station was silent. It wasn’t until Turner was walking Beth inside that she began to feel the nerves rattle through her body. She set her jaw and clenched her a handcuffed fists to keep from breaking under the pressure. She wanted to take it all back but it was far too late for that. She had to save her family from going down for something she’d instigated.

"You need a water or something?" Turner asked as they strode through the lobby of the station, his demeanor slightly more relaxed after finally getting what he wanted. 

"That would be nice." Beth replied softly, her throat suddenly feeling very parched.

"Do you want to call your husband?" The offer was surprising but Beth shook her head.

"In a bit." She supplied. "He's at a job interview."

"Oh." Turner seemed thrown off by her collected response, the hand wrapping her arm squeezing it comfortingly. "This way."

A voice stopped Agent Turner instantly, his feet grinding to a halt as the hand holding Beth’s arms tightened to almost painful. 

"Hey, Jimmy. How you been?" Boomer greeted them, while sitting next to Miriam. The man very much alive and decidedly not dismembered and wrapped in garbage bags.

* * *

"Hey, how was, uh, how was book club?" Dean asked as he folded laundry on the sofa, his eyes glued to the television.

"I lied." Her mind fluttered over her confession before explaining to his questioning look. "I didn't read the book."

"I didn't get that job."

"Then it wasn't meant to be." She murmured, her arms crossing as he looked over the back of the sofa at her.

"Where we're getting money from, I have no idea." Dean huffed, sliding the laundry basket aside.

"We could put the apartment thing on hold. Until we can afford it, you know?" Beth rounded the sofa to take a seat next to him.

"Yeah. Smart."

"Oh, no!" She noticed the movie on the screen, a cult classic he’d made her watch a hundred times over.

"Like a fine wine. Ooh, so good!" Dean crowed and then quoted his favorite movie line. "I shall serve no fries before their time."

Beth rolled her eyes and leaned back into the cushion with a sigh. "How many times have you seen this?"

"It's impossible to count right." Dean joked, nudging her elbow with his.

"Yeah, no, it's impossible."

* * *

When she’d gone to her van to grab her cell phone she hadn’t expected to be stuffed inside a trunk, a stiff cotton sack muffling her panicked breathes. If Beth had, she wouldn’t have worn her tight jeans and flimsy slippers.

One moment she was grabbing her phone and the next she was snatched from behind. She hadn’t had a second to fight back before the trunk closed and the car started moving. Fear gripped her heart. It thudded hard against her chest as she struggled with the binds around her wrists. She writhed to get free but the harder she tried, the tighter it seemed her restraints got. Tears choked her throat as her kids faces began to run through her mind, the way they would cry when she never came home.

What had she been thinking? Robbing, stealing, money laundering.

Lunacy.

Pure lunacy and now, now she was being taken to lords knows where, for what was sure to be a shallow grave.

There weren’t enough memories of handcrafted halloween costumes and homemade birthday cakes in the world too make up for her being torn from her kids lives. They would never get over the loss and by the time they graduated high school, they would probably forget what she looked or sounded like. 

And it was all her fault.

* * *

A sharp tug on the sack covering her face had Beth blinking through a head of messy hair. Her heart was racing as she caught the shadowed face in front of her. She gasped as he cut her wrist free before stepping away from her.

"I got you a gift." He rasped, the rough drawl of it too lazy for the circumstances.

Beth gaped at him him for a second, her hands turning to fists. "What is wrong with you? " she screeched, her slippered foot stomping in anger.

"You know, you're always saying I don't help?" Rio’s shoulders rolled with a shrug, his sharp chin tipping to the man bound of the floor. "That's me helping. This right here? That's your problem. Take care of it."

"I already did." Beth couldn’t believe her eyes, Turner was bloodied and gagged at their feet. She watched him stare at her with an unsettled look in his eyes. He squirmed with his restraints, his body slouched against a pillar in Rio’s loft.

"Nah, he's not just gonna let you walk away now."

"I fixed it." She insisted, shifting away from Rio as he paced.

"He knows your entire bag of tricks, darlin’ what you do, who you are." His smile turned feral. "He even knows what makes your garden grow."

His laughter rumbled out, that cocky smirk that used to twist her core into pleasant knots. Now it struck fear in her heart, she’d always underestimated him and his ability to get what he wanted.

"Oh. my bad. Yeah, I might've let that last one slip. Now, a guy like that can't let that slide." He slid up close, his chest brushing against hers as he rasped lowly in her ear but loud enough for Turner to hear. "How does that saying go? Cockle shells, silver bells, bodies all in a row? Ain't that right, boss?"

Rio’s hands grasped hers, his gun sliding into her palms. She felt him squeeze her hands into place before he stepped aside. "Come on. Just like we practiced. You got this."

Beth held the gun in her hand, her eyes on the FBI agent tied on the floor. She knew the man would never let up but she also knew she couldn’t just kill him. She wasn’t a psychopath.

"Come on." Rio encouraged, his tone turning frustrated.

"I don't want it."

"Yeah, well, I didn't get a gift receipt." He snapped, his hands settling into fists inside his pockets.

"Then why don't you do it?" Beth growled back, the gun pointing at the floor.

"‘Cause it's on you."

"No, it's not!" She shouted, her cheeks flush and chest heaving.

"Yeah. Yeah it is, mama."

"You put it on me."

"You asked for it." Rio hissed, his dark gaze pinning her with something close to fury.

"You put everything on me! The money, the dealership." Beth’s voice cracked, her emotions overflowing as everything caught up with her.

"Not easy being king, right?" His mocking tone only ignited her anger and frustration. She was so exhausted of feeling the weight of everything on her shoulders.

"You put it all on me so it's never on you. Nothing's ever on you!"

"Yeah, well, now you got a bigger problem, don't you?" Rios words were getting sharper, she could tell he was reaching the end of his patience with her. She felt her heart quicken as his eyes darkened the longer she refused to do as he said.

"You think he's my problem?" Beth asked breathlessly, her hands trembling with the weight of the gun as she waved it Turner’s direction.

Rio nodded decisively, his chin tipping to the other man. "So put on your big girl panties and take care of it."

"He's not my problem." Beth screeched, pointing the gun at Rio with more intent than the first time they’d done this dance.

"Shut your mouth, bitch, and just.."

She didn’t want to shoot him, she didn’t want to shoot anyone but then he’d reached for her and she’d reacted. The first shot landed in his chest and seemed to shock everyone in the room at the same time.

Beth stared with wide eyes and before she realized it, she’d squeezed the trigger two more times as he reached for her again.

* * *

The ringing of the gunshots and the sound of Rio coughing up blood was all Beth could hear for hours. She’d wandered home somehow, eventually clinging to Dean like some kind of life-raft in a sea of despair once she’d arrived. He hadn’t known what happened, only comforted her until she crawled into bed fully clothed. He removed her dirty slippers and tucked her in before leaving her bedroom.

* * *

_I see a bad moon a-rising_

_I see trouble on the way_

_I see earthquakes and lightnin'_

_I see bad times today_

_Don't go 'round tonight_

_It's bound to take your life_

_There's a bad moon on the rise_

"God, why." Beth grumbled, scrubbing her eyes of sleep as she peered down at her phone screen.

_4:00am, Monday, September 18_

Turning off the alarm, Beth pushed herself upright to ready herself for the stressful day ahead. She felt far more hungover than she expected, her eyes fluttering at the pain in her head.

It wasn’t everyday that one confessed to being a murderer to the FBI. She needed to do it right and with a style that would make her PTA friends jealous of her seat on death row.

Stripping off her pajamas she tried to remember how much she drank the evening before, her head feeling hazy and unsettled. She’d had the weirdest dream that seemed fuzzier the longer she tried to recall it. She remembered something about being in a dark place, a feeling of suffocation and then nothing. She could feel the edges of anxiety still rattling through her body but the harder she tried, the less she could remember.

Shaking off the feeling, Beth turned on the knob in her shower stall. The head sputtered to life, icy water raining down on her hand before it finally heated up.

“Dean needs to check on the water heater.” She reminded herself, the mental notes she’d started to collect becoming a huge laundry list.

She showered quickly, her hands scrubbing her hair clean and then body moisturized once dried. As she stepped away from the mirror to enter her bedroom, Beth tripped over the bathmat. She fell face first towards the tile floor, only catching herself last minute by bracing herself on the bathroom door. The long mirror attached to the surface splintered under the pressure, spiderwebbed cracks spreading out below her palm. The sensation of it had her dizzy, a strange sense of déjà vu filling her chest and head.

"Shit." Beth muttered, pulling her bloodied palm from the broken mirrored surface. She felt a strange tingling in the back of her mind, a sense of having experienced the event before. But that didn’t make sense as the mirror hadn’t been damaged prior to her falling. Shaking off the sensation, she cleaned up the tiny cut on her palm and added the needed repair to the list of things Dean would need to take care of when she was gone. She had too much to do to sit around wondering what strange dreams she had or the odd feeling settled between her shoulder blades.

* * *

"Gift from the D.A." Turner pushed the folder towards Beth. "It's what we talked about. Country club living, time for good behavior. All of it."

"And everyone else walks away?" Beth asked, her hands flipping through the paperwork inside the file folder.

"D.A. signed off. Now you." The FBI agent replied. "Where do you want to do this?"

Beth swallowed thickly, nerves slowly growing inside her. "I put out some sweets in the other room."

_"My name is Elizabeth Irene Boland, and this is how I murdered Leslie Peterson."_

The words felt familiar but she begged it off as the preparations she made for the event. She’d repeated her thoughts on her confessions for days, now that she was saying it out loud, it felt as though she’d done it all before.

_"And then I backed my car over him. And I wrapped him in a tarp."_

_-"Officer Hill said in his affidavit this morning that you put the body in the freezer."_

_"Does it matter?"_

_-"I'm afraid it does. How did you fit the body in the freezer?"_

_"You know those electric knives, the ones you use at Thanksgiving?"_

* * *

If Beth didn’t hate the slimy little worm so much, she would’ve kissed Boomer on his dopey freckled face. His sudden appearance at the police station saved her ass from prison and made Agent Turner look like a fool.

While in the uber that brought her home from the police station, Beth allowed herself to go over the rollercoaster of a day. It couldn’t have worked out better in Beth’s mind, well except if a certain someone would’ve lifted a finger to help out.

Like often, her mind strayed to Rio. Even after everything, the lies and manipulation, she still craved him. There was an addicting magnetism about him. Beth actually felt _seen_ , in a way that she hadn’t been in her whole life. It was quite easily habit forming. His eyes, those lips. Capable of taking her spirts higher than ever, before grinding her self-worth into the ground under his sneakered heel. She hated him.

_"Hate you."_

_-"Hate your face."_

Maybe she just hated that she liked him despite all of it.

* * *

The cotton sack over her head smelled musty, the thickness of it making it hard to breath. The tears soaking her cheeks made her eye makeup run, the gumminess of her mascara clumping her eyelashes together. All she wanted was to go home but as she was marched up a staircase and dragged through several doorways, her hope to survive dwindled.

Suddenly the sack covering her face was pulled away and Beth found herself somehow unsurprised by Rio’s face beyond her messy bangs. She gasped regardlessly as he slipped a knife between her wrists and freed her hands.

"I got you a gift." He rasped, the rough drawl of it as lazy as always.

Beth glared at him, her hands balled at her sides. "What’s wrong with you?"

"You know, you're always sayin’ I don't help?" Rio rolled his shoulder with a easy shrug, his grin aimed at the man bound of the floor.

Beth was dizzy from the whole exchange, her body feeling as though it’d been transported to some alternate universe where everything repeated itself. His words seemed to scroll through her head seconds before his lips moved. Beth was unable to even unpack that disorienting realization, before Rio was speaking again.

"That's me helping. This right here? That's your problem. Take care of it."

The image of Turner bound and gagged seemed familiar, his scuffed face and bruised eye. Blinking in confusion, Beth replied. "I already did... all of this happened before."

"Yeah I know, we keep runnin’ in circles, ma. You never listen."

"No, you don’t get it.”

"Clean up your mess, Elizabeth." Rio shouted, pointing an angry finger in Turner’s direction.

She looked at the man as he stared up at her with an pleading look in his eyes. He squirmed with his restraints, his body resting against the brick pillar.

"he ain’t walkin’ away from you." Rio voice pulled her eyes from the beaten FBI agent. "He’ll always be lookin’ to nail your ass."

"I fixed it already." She growled, stepping away from Rio as he paced closer towards her. "He saw that Boomer’s alive. I’m in the clear."

"He knows your entire bag of tricks, darlin’. What you do, who you are." His smile turned feral. "He even knows what makes your garden grow."

His laughter shook his body, his cocky smirk twisting her stomach while also infuriating her. Beth was suddenly aware of his nearness, her breath stolen as his fingers brushed the edges of her hair.

"Oh. my bad. Yeah, I might've let that last one slip. Now, a guy like that can't let that slide." His chest brushed against hers as he rasped. "How does that saying go? Cockle shells, silver bells, bodies all in a row?"

Rio looked over at Turner. "Ain't that right, boss?"

Beth swallowed thickly, her body trembling with nerves as Rio returned to her side. He grabbed her wrist and slide his gun into her palm. He deftly positioned her fingers around the cold metal grip before he sauntered away, his head cocking to the side.

"Come on. Just like we practiced. You got this."

Beth held the gun in her hand, trying to shake off the icy feeling walking its fingers up her spine. Her gaze was on the FBI agent tied on the floor, but her mind was unravelling. She knew Turner would never let up but she wasn’t a killer. No matter what Rio said, she wasn’t going to step over that line willingly.  
  


"Come on." Rio growled, his words becoming frustrated.

"I don't want this.” She waved a hand towards Turner. “This won’t work.”

"Yeah, well, I didn't get a gift receipt." His hands settled into fists inside his pockets. “So do it already.”

"Why don’t you do it.” Beth snapped, the gun pointing at the floor rather than at the bound man.

"‘Cause it's on you." His voice was growing harsher, the grit that used to make her thighs clench with pleasant anticipation turning her stomach for new reasons. She felt a sense of dread filling her, the gun in her hand feeling heavier than ever before.

"No, it's not!" She shouted, her hand tightening.

"Yeah. Yeah it is, mama."

"You always do this!” Beth huffed out an angry breath, “you blame me, you use me.”

"You asked for it."

"You put everything on me! The money, the dealership." Beth snapped at him, “you put those units in my name. I’m your scapegoat!”

"Not easy being king, right?" Rio smirked at her emotional state, his tongue darting over his lips as she came unglued in front of him.

"You put it all on me, so it's never on you.” She screamed, the urge to throw the gun at him almost too strong to overcome. “Nothing's ever on you!"

"Yeah, well, now you got a bigger problem, don't you?" Rio point his sharp jaw in Turner’s direction. “Take care of your problems, mama.”

"You think he's my problem?" Beth cackled hysterically, her eyes turning wild.

"Yeah." Rio glared at her, "Put on your big girl panties and take care of it."

"He's not my problem." Beth spoke the words but it was almost as though someone else was moving her lips. The strongest feeling of déjà vu filled her head and made her eyes go glassy, but still her hand rose to aim the gun at Rio as he approached.

"Shut your mouth, bitch, and just..” his words were cut off by the loud bang of a gunshot. Beth watched in horror as the blood began to seep through his button down shirt. When his eyes rose from the growing stain, she saw nothing but fury and rage burning in those dark eyes. She didn’t hesitate to pull the trigger two more times when he lunged for the weapon.

From that point, time seemed to slow down while also speeding up. Her walk home filled with stumbled steps and blurry surroundings, but suddenly she was entering her home. Her head fluttered through the horrific images of Rio falling to the ground, his mouth coated red as he choked on blood. Beth felt splintered, the images stuttering and replaying over and over, sometimes slightly different than before. Her ears were still ringing from the sharp gunshots reverberating against those brick walls.

By the time she arrived home, Beth was near catatonic. It wasn’t until Dean was tucking her into bed when she finally spoke.

“Is it really over?”

Dean looked down at her a moment before answering, “get some sleep, Bethie. You’ll feel better in the morning.”

* * *

  
  
I see a bad moon a-rising

_I see trouble on the way_

_I see earthquakes and lightnin'_

_I see bad times today_

_Don't go 'round tonight_

_It's bound to take your life_

_There's a bad moon on the rise_

Beth gasped loudly, sitting upright in bed, her hand grabbing her phone frantically. She turned the alarm off and squinted at the bright screen.

_4:00am, Monday, September 18_

“Shit.” She muttered, her mind was hazy but the residual images of Rio and Turner were still raw and painful. Beth wasn’t sure how many times it had happened, but she was fairly confident she was reliving the most horrible day of her life. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Story contains dialog from Good Girls and lyrics from Creedence Clearwater Revival, Bad Moon Rising. I do not own either unfortunately.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fyi: Chapter edited with additional content. 5/16/20

The first thing Beth did when she awoke to realize she was reliving the same day was deny it and look for a reason for her confusion. She lay there trying to remember if she’d taken any prescription medicine with her bourbon the night before or if she’d hit her head. After a few seconds she realized she wasn’t even sure what night before she was thinking about. If it was last night, well that felt like the evening she’d shot Rio.

The thought had her eyes clenching shut and hands balling up. Flashes of his shocked expression kept replaying in her head, his fingers touching the blood blooming across his chest. The sound of the gunshots still reverberated in her aural memory.

However, if she were thinking about last night by looking at the date and time on her phone, she’d had some drinks with Ruby. They surely hadn’t been popping pills, which could only mean...

"I’m losing my mind." Beth huffed, rubbing her eyes while pushing herself upright. She just needed to shower and drink some coffee, she told herself. It had to be a dream.

* * *

She glared at the mirror before looking at her bloody palm. Beth had tripped over the bathmat seconds after she recalled doing it before. The only problem being the mirror hadn’t been broken until she’d smashed her hand into it. She knew they hadn’t replaced it before, the same one hung there for the last fifteen years. She’d hung it herself after finding it at a rummage sale.

"It doesn’t mean anything." Beth spoke to herself in the mirror as she bandaged her palm. "Coincidence. That’s all."

* * *

_"And then I backed my car over him. And I wrapped him in a tarp."_

_-"Officer Hill said in his affidavit this morning that you put the body in the freezer."_

_"Does it matter?"_

_-_ _"I'm afraid it does. How did -?"_

_"Electric knife."_

Beth answered the question before he even asked it. She knew Turner was going to inquire on how she fit the body in the small meat freezer. The next several questions were also answered before they’d been completely asked, her head spinning with the meaning of it all.

She wasn’t completely clear on what happened previously through the entire day but she clearly remembered shooting Rio. There was an aching pit in her gut from the images that she could recall.

Except for those few moments, there was a hazy to all of it. Most of the time she only remembered her previous experiences seconds before they happened. The idea that she wasn’t quite sure how many times it had occurred plagued her through the rest of her day.

She had to fix things as best as she could. Beth wouldn’t let the evening play out as it had, however many times she’d lived it.

* * *

After being released by the FBI due to Boomer’s reappearance, Beth was on a mission. She needed to stop Rio from kidnapping Turner and essentially starting whatever funhouse life she was now living. Her first stop was the bar that they used to meet at, but it only led to her having a couple drinks. She left as soon as she began to get hit on, her head swimming a bit as the cold air smacked her. Beth then took an uber to the park and with an extra couple of twenties she got her driver to sweep through the neighborhood she’d seen him drop Marcus off at. Soon the sun was setting and Beth was near broke and nowhere near finding him. After a short stop at a liquor store for a handful of minis bottles of liquor, Beth headed to the loft in hopes she would catch Rio before he came to kidnap her.

Climbing the fire escape drunk was dangerous but it didn’t stop her. Beth knew she should’ve stayed sober to deal with the train wreck of her life, but it was all becoming too much. She almost fell twice before she came to the window leading to his loft.

With a firm shove the glass frame opened and allowed her to crawl inside the cavernous space. She heard the soft grunt and sound of flesh hitting flesh before she saw them. Rio had Turner tied up and gagged, his body propped against the pillar as he brought another fist down on his face. Beth froze for a moment before her lips worked.

"Don’t worry about picking me up. I ubered." She stepped towards the men, both of them seemingly surprised at her appearance.

"Elizabeth." Rio rasped, rising from the beaten body on the floor. "What’re you doin’ here?"

"Call it women’s intuition." Beth quipped, circling around them to keep her distance.

Rio looked suspicious, his mind oblivious racing to find the reason for her sudden appearance. "Just in the neighborhood, yeah?"

Beth smirked, the alcohol in her system turning her a little reckless. " _Obliviously_."

"Right." Rio stepped closer, but she retreated with every step. "Leavin’ so soon?"

Beth stopped as the kitchen island touched her lower back. "This isn’t going to work."

"What would that be, ma?" Rio asked as he came within arms reach.

"You trying to get me to do that." She tipped her chin towards Turner who sat on the floor. "I’m not doing it."

"Haven’t even told you what to do yet."

"Yeah, well, I’m not doing it." Beth snapped, her hands wrapping around the edge of the countertop behind her. "I’m not your puppet."

"Why you here, ma?" Rio’s voice was strangely calm, but his eyes were determined. "You stalking me again?"

"No." She huffed, crossing her arms over her chest in an attempt to keep some distance from his approach. "Maybe you’re just not that smooth after all."

"Yeah?"

"Yes." Beth hissed at his look of amusement. "Maybe I just know your moves already. Maybe you should flip your game and try not being a manipulative _asshole_."

His large hands blocked her into the kitchen island, his broad shoulders and inked neck all she could see until she tipped her head back. It made her recall the daydream she had the last time she was in the very same kitchen, her body laid out before him to devour.

"Tha’ right?" His voice dipped lower as he stared at her, the tension growing between them the longer he gazed. The air thinned to something tight and elastic in her lungs, the lack of oxygen making her dizzy. "You didn’t think I was an asshole when you spread those creamy pale thighs for me, ma. Member you _beggin_ ’ me for it."

"Shut up." Her cheeks burned as he filled her senses, the heat of his body and smell of expensive cologne turning her weak kneed. 

"Why? You soakin’ them panties, mami?"

"Shut. Up." Beth snapped, pushing against his chest. "I’m not here for that."

"Naw?" He cocked an eyebrow, his jaw rocking thoughtfully. "Why you here then?"

"To stop what you have planned here."

"How do you know what I got planned?"

"Maybe you have another rotten egg. Maybe someone with loose lips." She taunted as she ducked under his arm to escape his overwhelming presence. "Maybe you should focus on that and not this scheme you have to get my hands dirty."

Rio eyed her hard as he pulled out the familiar handgun from his waistband. "You’re gonna take care of your mess, Elizabeth."

"I’m not doing it."

"He ain’t leavin’ you alone."

"I fixed it, he knows Boomer is alive."

"He knows your entire bag of tricks, darlin’ what you do, who you are." Rio tipped his chin to the bound man. "He even knows what makes your garden grow."

He smirked at her in amusement as she glared back. "Oh. my bad. Yeah, I might've let that last one slip. Now, a guy like that can't let that slide. You know the sayin’-"

Beth felt her heart racing as the words spilled from her lips, "Cockle shells, silver bells, bodies all in a row..."

Rio froze mid step, his plump lip dropping open in surprise.

"I thought you hated snitches." She spoke before he could question her. "Remember Eddie."

Rio’s eyes darkened at her hasty words. "You don’t know shit."

"I know a lot. Maybe he should too." Beth’s eyes tuning bright at his anger.

"You do that and you got a bigger problem than him." Rio’s voice was colder than she’d ever heard it, the air around them humming like a thunderstorm.

"You think he’s my problem?" Beth spoke the sentence, her head swimming with alcohol and deja vu.

"Ma, you got lots of problems." He reached out suddenly, grasping her wrist and yanking her closer.

"Fuck you."

"Nah," he licked his pouty lip. "Already hit it. Ain’t worth the trouble."

Beth felt her temper burn bright, her free hand slapping Rio across the face. The shock of it moved up her arm, surprising them both.

She watched his head cock to the side as he regarded her, his jaw clenching before he licked the trickle of blood on his lip from her slap.

"You get one." His voice was a rough grind of consonants and vowels, the threat behind it ominous. 

"Then what." Beth taunted, the booze she’d ingested at the bar and while climbing the fire escape still dumbing her fear and strengthening her recklessness. Her palm landed lower on his jaw the next time but wasn’t nearly as hard. It didn’t stop him from surging forward, his hand wrapping her neck as he pressed the gun under her jaw.

"Never learn, Elizabeth." He growled against her ear as he pinned her against the rough brick. "You keep thinkin’ cuz I been in you, I ain’t dangerous."

All she could do was claw at his hand as it tightened, the bite of his fingers pinching her skin as the cold metal bruised her jaw. Beth became frantic as he kept pressing, his dark eyes glaring down at her.

"You more trouble than you worth." The words were growled angrily but the pressure began to loosen on her neck. Beth gasped in a breath when his hands disappeared. She bent slightly at the waist and gasped sharply as she noticed the two men struggling over the gun. She hadn’t realized Turner had gotten himself free until he’d grabbed Rio. 

She was barely catching her breath when the gun went off, the loud ringing in her ear making her cringe. Beth startled when a hand touched her shoulder, her head tilting up to see Turner standing over her with Rio’s gun. Her eyes jumped to the ground where she found Rio coughing up blood as he touched his chest. Red blooming across the surface.

"Go." Turner growled, his hand grabbing her bicep to yank her from the floor. "You owe me."

"But-."

"Go home." He barked, pushing her towards the front door.

* * *

_I see a bad moon a-rising_

_I see trouble on the way_

_I see earthquakes and lightnin'_

_I see bad times today_

_Don't go 'round tonight_

_It's bound to take your life_

_There's a bad moon on the rise_

"No." Beth moaned as she sat up in bed, her hand grabbing her phone from the bedside table. She launched herself out of bed and across the bedroom before she knew what she was doing. Unlocking the patio door, Beth stepped out into the frigid air and chucked the device as far as her arm could throw. She watched it bounce off the flagstone and slide across the grass.

She glared at it while panting heavily, her mind racing from the night before. The evening still ended with Rio being shot, but by Turner’s hand and not hers. Yet she still woke up to relive the same day.

Beth slumped against the door after going back inside, her eyes closing as she racked her brain for an escape from the hellish day. Pushing off the doorframe, she prepared herself for the FBIs arrival. Maybe she could change everything by doing something different in the morning.

* * *

"Gift from the D.A." Turner pushed the folder towards Beth. "It's what we talked about. Country club living, time for good behavior. All of it."

"No thank you." Beth replied, her arms crossed.

"No thank you?" Turner’s tone became steely, his eyes darkening as she gazed back at him. Her nerves were frayed and trembling. She wasn’t sure what would help her situation, but figured she would only find out if she tried all avenues. Maybe if she didn’t confess, her day would take a different route. Maybe Turner wouldn’t end up in Rio’s loft and she could wake up to a new day.

"Yes. I’ve changed my mind." Beth spoke while sliding the file back towards the man.

"Do you think this is a game, Mrs. Boland?"

"No, but I can’t confess to something I didn’t do."

"You realize that I will still arrest you, I have witness testimony."

"Will you do it today?"

"This is your last chance. You won’t get anymore deals."

"I understand."

"Okay, Elizabeth Irene Boland, you’re under arrest for the murder of Leslie Peterson."

* * *

Beth stood with Rio’s gun in her hand, her arm trembling as he grinned at her.

"Come on. Just like we practiced." His chin lifted encouragingly. "You got this, ma."

Her mind was racing at the choices laying before her. Her lack of confession did nothing but speed up her trip to the police station. She’d spent several hours being detained before they released her. As she exited she watched Turner pacing in front of Boomer and Miriam. He had finally arrived, giving Beth the reprieve she needed. 

" _Be safe tonight, Agent Turner."_

_-"That a threat, Mrs. Boland?"_

_"Just some friendly advice."_

Beth grimaced at the memory, her eyes falling to the very man at her feet.

"Come on."

"I don’t want to."

"Yeah, well you asked for help and this is me helpin’. Whatchu expect, Elizabeth?"

"I don’t know." She muttered, shaking her messy hair from her face. "Not this."

"This is what you got, baby. Now do it."

Beth swallowed passed the knot developing in her throat, her hand tightening around the grip as she aimed the weapon at Turner.

"I’m sorry." The words were smothered by the loud gunshot and resulting moan of pain. Beth pulled the trigger twice more, her aim hitting the bound man in the chest and stomach.

The high pitch ringing in her ear was painful, the room fading in and out as she watched Turner die.

"There’s my girl." Rio’s voice was surprisingly rough and low next to her ear, the heat from his body framing her own. Beth felt him slide the gun from her grasp, his other hand gripping her hip. "You did good, mami."

"Now what?"

Rio slowly rotated her away from the dead body, "Now, I own you."

"W-what?"

Rio’s hand sunk into her hair, his long fingers curling into a fist to tug her head back sharply. Her eyes fluttered before focusing on the camera on the ceiling.

"Say hi, mami. It’s all on you now."

"No, it's not!" She shouted, her cheeks flush and chest heaving as she yanked away from him.

"Yeah. Yeah it is, mama."

"You put it all on me."

"You asked for it." Rio hissed, his dark gaze following her unsteady steps.

"You put everything on me! The money, the dealership." Beth’s voice was wrecked, the tremble of it showing the emotional toll of living the evening over and over. She just wanted it to be done.

"Not easy being king, right?" Rio cut into the haze, the mocking tone frustrating and infuriating her.

She was so tired of everything being a big joke to him. Like she was a big joke.

"You put it all on me so it's never on you. Nothing's ever on you!"

"Yeah, well, now you got a bigger problem, don't you?" Rio kicked Turner’s limp leg.

"You think he's my problem?" Beth scoffed loudly. "He's not my problem."

"Watch your tone, mami." Rio’s demeanor turned icy, his gaze heavy and dark. "Now go home while I take out your trash. _Again_."

"I hate you." The venom in her words shot tension through the air, the cutting silence that followed stiffening her spine and jaw as she prepared for his full wrath.

"Go home, Elizabeth. You’re done." Rio’s eyes were sharp and spiteful. "It’s over."

_"I’m done."_

_-"Is that right?"_

_"No more cash. No more pills..._ _It’s over."_

* * *

_I see a bad moon a-rising_

_I see trouble on the way_

_I see earthquakes and lightnin'_

_I see bad times today_

_Don't go 'round tonight_

_It's bound to take your life_

_There's a bad moon on the rise_

Beth skipped baking and went straight for the liquor cabinet to dose her morning coffee. Her slippers scuffed along the wood deck as she plopped down into one of the deck chairs. She listened to the garbage truck picking up cans and the incessant bark of Mrs. Neidmyer’s show dog. All of the sounds melding into a white noise. She knew she had to try something else to fix everything but she was quickly losing motivation. With every repeated day, every failed attempt at changing the outcome, someone always ended up shot.

"Nothing even matters." She muttered, taking a gulp of coffee laced with bourbon.

By the time the kids were on their way out the door with Dean, Beth was on the warm side of drunk. She searched the cupboards for another bottle of liquor when her cup ran dry but she came up empty.

Beth pulled on an oversized hoodie and called an uber for a ride to the grocery store. Turner and his men were going to arrive soon and she was not going to waste another day in interrogation. She had her mind set on drinking the day away while eating her weight in junk food. Her mental shopping list was several pages long when the black sedan pulled up to the curb.

Beth settled into the backseat without glancing up, her clumsy hands fumbling with the seatbelt.

"Need some help, ma?"

The voice jolted Beth out of her daze, her eyes jumping to Rio’s in the front seat.

"You’re not supposed to be here. Not yet."

"You drunk already, mama?" He looked her over with a raised brow. "What? Trouble in paradise?"

Beth released a bitter laugh, the alcohol making the weight of everything unbearable. "I don’t live in paradise."

"No? Tell me all about it, mami. That hard knock life behind the white picket fences."

"You just think you know everything." Beth spat, her hand gripping her purse. "You don’t know shit about me."

"Oh yeah, fill me in, Princess."

Beth ground her teeth before unloading a lifetime of baggage. "First off, I didn’t grow up behind a picket fence. I lived in a shithole rental with my bipolar mother and a baby sister who was basically my kid at ten. My dad left when mom stopped getting out of bed. Annie was a month old."

She glared at him to keep from crying. "You don’t know that after Jane was born I could barely get myself out of bed to take care of her. Ruby and Annie spent weeks keeping me from walking off a ledge. Drs said postpartum but Dean said it was all just in my head."

Rio was looking at her with a stoic expression, but she could see the tension in his jaw.

"That’s when the affairs started." Her fingers twisted in the cuffs of her hoodie. "The girls don’t know this but... I knew back then, I... didn’t admit it to myself but when Amber happened I remembered."

Beth rested her head back and felt a tear escape the corner of her eye. "He was at a conference, at least, he said he was. Jane and Emma were both sick and had dr appts. I couldn’t find the keys to the van and I knew he had a spare but I couldn’t find those. I called to ask him where they were an a woman answered."

Beth blinked hard and sat up, wiping her cheek with her shoulder. She let the memory fall away.

"You don’t know that not only was he sleeping around on me but he ran the family business into the ground, lost all our money, mortgaged our house three times over and spent the kids college funds. Which is why I robbed a grocery store and met you."

Rio’s lip twitched at the revelation.

"You don’t know that to get me to take him back he lied to me about having cancer. He had a doctor lie to me. Had our kids thinking he was dying so I’d let him move back home."

Beth felt the lump grow in her throat at the memory. "I actually cried over him, I felt bad for hating him, for being a terrible husband and it was all a lie. Then I finally find something of my own. Something I’m good at, he just crushes it. He... he actually told me that we each have things were good at, me..." Beth scoffed loudly. "I’m good at making sandwiches and he’s the man so you know, he’s good at the business."

"Carman ain’t too bright."

"Then he just takes ‘em from me." Beth ignored his comment, her true anger bubbling to a head. "I come home and they’re just gone and he’s.. he’s holding them hostage like some big.. big man. Stealing kids from their mom. Giving me ultimatums. No money, no drugs or else no kids.”

Beth bared her clenched teeth at the memory of how painful it was to be without her kids.

"You don’t know that I spent my whole life getting stuffed into these... these roles, just crammed into these boxes and never getting to choose. I finally find something I’m good at, something that makes me feel something other than suffocated but it’ll cost me the only good things in my life."

Beth finally glanced back at Rio who stared back at her with dark eyes.

"You think you know me, you think you got everything figured out but you don’t. You don’t know anything."

Beth climbed out of the car without looking back, her stride only slightly hindered by the bourbon.

* * *

Beth cradled the bottle of rum to her chest while shuffling down the snack aisle of the nearest convenience store. She grabbed two packages of zingers and a large Hershey bar. Her hazy eyes focused on the slurpy machine, the swirling shape drawing her in.

"Rum and coke anyone?" She giggled to herself, while filling the cup halfway before cracking the rum open.

"Hey." The clerk exclaimed from behind the counter. "I told you before, lady. You can’t do that."

"Oh calm down. I’m gonna pay." Beth topped the rum off with more coke icee and then gathered up all her purchases. She gave the clerk a flawless smile. "Two packs of Marlboros, please and thank you."

"Beth, is that you?"

"Oh, hey Meredith." Beth forced a placating smile on her face as she glanced back at the fellow PTA mom.

"I didn’t know you _smoked_." The blonde women whispered the word as though it were scandalous to even say it, let alone do it.

Beth handed over cash to the cashier as she replied, "I guess we all have our vices, right, Mer?"

She took a big swig of her rum and coke icee as the guy bagged her items.

"I wouldn’t know." Meredith gave her a snotty smile. "My body is temple."

"A temple of collagen injections and saline implants." Beth’s saccharine smile was a bit too bright to be genuine.

"We can’t all carry your kind of curves around." Meredith retorted, her arms crossing under her perky breasts as she looked over Beth’s curvy shape. "I just can’t seem to keep that kind of extra weight on."

Beth glared at her a moment before grabbing her bag of junk food and alcohol.

"I bet that’s why Dean had a wandering eye." Meredith jabbed as Beth reached the exit, her hand wrapping around the handle tightly.

"I s’pose you know all about wandering eyes huh, Meredith? You’re wife what? number five for Jack." Beth had heard all kinds of rumors about the other women’s husband, the man a serial groom with a long line of scorned women. "Tick tock, sweetheart."

Beth pushed her way outside with a triumphant smirk. She took a gulp of her drink while striding through the parking lot.

"Mrs Boland." Turner’s voice killed her cocky grin instantly, the man standing with several officers nearby. "You missed our appointment."

"I guess the time got away with me." Beth replied, holding up her plastic sack. "I needed sustenance."

"I don’t think Captain Morgan is in the food pyramid."

"I actually think My Plate is a better representation of a balanced diet." She took a noisy slurp of her drink before they could take it from her. 

"Get in the car, Mrs Boland."

Beth felt her temper flare up at the man’s demand, her spine stiffening up as she glared at him. "No."

Agent Turner stepped forward, his voice becoming harder. "Don’t make this harder than it has to be. Get in the car."

"No." Beth repeated through clenched teeth as everything that had been brewing inside overwhelmed her. "No I won’t get in the car. I won’t confess to shit I didn’t do and I won’t let another man tell me what to do. So why don’t you get in the car and fuck off."

Beth chucked the half empty bottle of rum at Turner, causing a chain reaction from the officers behind him. She could hear them yelling commands at her as she stepped away from Turner in an attempt to leave but she kept going.

The loud pop and resulting pain dropped Beth to the ground. She felt her body turn to stone as two officer tased her.

"Didn’t have to be like this." Turner said as he crouched next to her head . "Elizabeth Irene Boland, you’re under arrest for resisting arrest and the assault of United States federal agent. I’m sure I can find enough to add murder in the first degree."

* * *

Beth stood against the wall as they took her mug shot, her makeup smeared and eyes bloodshot. She wasn’t sure who invented the taser but she hadn’t their guts. Her entire body ached from the muscle spasming it had caused and the deep bruising from the prongs stung sharply.

"Turn right." A gruff officer ordered, before snapping her profile picture. "Go to your right and stop at the red line."

She was moved from one room to another where she was stripped searched and placed in a gray cell. Her buzz was slowly wearing off and now she was regretting her impulsive act of violence.

"Worst. Day. Ever." Beth sighed before a hysterical giggle escaped her lips, the irony of it hitting her hard.

"Oh my god. Worst day. _Forever_." She laughed until her stomach hurt and tears ran down her flushed cheeks. Slowly the laughter turned to sobs and the tears became bitter. Jagged hiccuped gasps tore her throat up as everything inside her broke up until she became cold and numb. Eventually, Beth scrubbed her face and laid down on the stiff metal bunk, closing her bloodshot eyes. For the first time since it all started repeating, she found herself looking forward to that horrendous wake up call.

* * *

_I see a bad moon a-rising_

_I see trouble on the way_

_I see earthquakes and lightnin'_

_I see bad times today_

_Don't go 'round tonight_

_It's bound to take your life_

_There's a bad moon on the rise_

* * *

So, let me get this right." Annie gave Beth a speculative look, her brows raised almost to her hairline. "You’re waking up every morning living the same day." 

"Yes." Beth huffed with crossed arms and a frustrated scowl at having to repeat herself. 

"Welcome to my life." Annie exclaimed, swiping the air dramatically. "Same shit different day, baby."

"No. Like, I’m  literally  living the same day." She leaned forward and grabbed the bottle of wine for a refill. Beth hadn’t stayed in her house more than five seconds after the kids left for school with Dean. She’d grabbed her bag and hopped in her car to try and get help from the only person who might believe her. Ruby would probably try, but the science fiction freakshow her life had become was very far fetched. It would take some serious open mind thinking and Beth couldn’t think of anyone more open to possibilities than Annie. 

Annie squinted with her head cocked slightly, "Did you get into gangfriend’s drug supply?"

"No, Annie. Come on, why would I make this up?"

"I’m not saying you don’t believe it, I’m just saying..."

"What?"

"Well, you sound like a row short of a full box of Oreos."

Beth rubbed her face roughly and raked her fingers through her hair. 

"Fine, I’ll play along. So, what happens?"

Beth froze at the realization that she would have to tell her gory details of the worst moments of her life. 

"Lots of things."

"Eh, Eh." Annie clucked her tongue at her sister and sipped her coffee. "You’ve got to give me something. Convince me your not just cracking up."

"I wake up and do everything like I planned."

"What plan?"

"I confessed to Boomer’s murder."

"You confessed?"

"Yeah a few times and sometimes I don’t but I still get arrested. Once I got arrested for assault against Turner."

Annie stared at her for a solid moment before deadpanning, "is that all?"

"No, I... I shot Rio and... I’ve shot Turner. Once, Turner shot Rio."

"Beth." Her sister stood up from the sofa, her colorful rainbow pajama pants swishing as she paced. 

"Look. I know it’s crazy but it’s happening and I need help. I need to fix everything."

"And how am I helping? Is this gonna be a Back to the Future type situation? We do something or not do something and I start disappearing from family photos? I don’t want to flap that butterfly’s wings."

"What?" Beth furrowed her brow and shook her head. "Nevermind, I’m telling you it doesn’t matter what I do, I wake up tomorrow and it’s still today."

"Oh," Annie sunk back into her sofa. "Well in that case? I’m playing hookie and we’re having a night on the town."

"It’s 10am."

Annie jumped from her spot and grabbed clothing in a basket sitting on her coffee table. "That’s plenty of time for us to find club ware."

"Annie."

"Hey, you’ve had some pretty shit months and you’re telling me it doesn’t matter what you do, so prove it. What do you have to lose?"

* * *

  
  


Beth stared at the skintight dress Annie had talked her into, the plush velvety fabric clinging to every curve and dip. She hadn’t worn something that sexy since... well ever and now that they were steps from leaving for their night out, she wasn’t too sure she had the guts.   
Then she recalled their earlier conversation in the dressing room.   
  
  


" _If nothing matters, why not try to have a little fun." Annie exclaimed, her hands thrown up in the air as Beth complained about every dress she’d brought into the dressing room. "I mean, you said bad shit happens usually."_

_"If by bad you mean murder, then yes Annie, bad shit happens."_

_"Exactly, so like, live a little already, sis."_

Beth sighed before exiting the bathroom. She found Annie applying more eyeliner at the bureau mirror. 

"Annie, you put anymore of that on your eyes and you’ll turn into a raccoon."

"Don’t be jealous, Beth. Just because I can pull off cat’s eye better than you."

"Well, that’s just an outright lie."

"Yeah, you’re right. You rock at it." Annie huffed, stuffing the eye pencil into her little clutch purse. "You ready?"

"As I’ll ever be."

* * *

"Shots, shots, shots." Annie was pounding on the table as Beth threw back two tequila shots in a row.

"Ugh." Beth grumbled at the scorch going down her throat and coating her tongue. "I’m gonna regret that tomorrow."

"No you won’t." Her sister quipped causing Beth to throw her head back and cackle. They both laughed until their eyes watered. 

"it’s kinda weird." Annie began, taking a sip of her drink before continuing. "I believe you."

"You do?" Beth hadn’t been too sure Annie would actually believe her but now that she did, she hoped she could help unstick her.

"I mean, like, you’re a good liar but time travel is a little crazy even for you."

Beth rolled her eyes and sipped the pint of beer in front of her. "Gee, thanks."

"So, what’re you gonna do?" Annie threw back another shot of tequila. 

"I don’t know," she sighed, her eyes scanning the bar for an answer. 

"I know what you need." Annie clapped before jumping out of the booth. "Karaoke!"

* * *

"I see a bad moon a-rising

I see trouble on the way

I see earthquakes and lightnin'

I see bad times today"

Beth sang what felt like her anthem, her head tilted back and words slurred after all the shots Annie kept handing her. 

"Don't go 'round tonight

It's bound to take your life

There's a bad moon on the rise

I hear hurricanes a-blowing

I know the end is coming soon

I fear rivers over flowing

I hear the voice of rage and ruin"

  
  
She hated the song and couldn’t stand that she woke to it every morning but Beth couldn’t help but sing it. 

"There's a bad moon on the rise"

When the music petered out, Beth stumbled down the steps to the bar area where Annie sat. She pointed towards the bathroom, weaving her way there. She giggled as she bumped into the door-jam as she avoid a group of women leaving. The bathroom was painted bright red and black stripes, the walls lined with band posters and graffiti. The black shiny floor led to three stalls, the metal barriers all hanging open.   
Beth chose the middle one, her heels wobbling as she perched above the seat and did her business. Her head bobbed to the music piped in above her, the tinny sound nearly smothered from the thump of the bass outside. 

The toilet flushed loudly, as she smoothed her skirt down and flipped the lock on the stall door. Beth stepped out with intent to wash her hands when she was grabbed from behind. A shriek escaping her throat as thick cotton was tugged over her head. She struggled as a heavy shape pressed her into the wall, a pair of hands yanking her wrists behind her back.

"Goddamnit." She groaned as her skin was pinched by plastic zip ties. "Can’t I have a night off?"

The person clutching her bicep dragged her out of the bathroom and deeper down the long hallway. The music covered her growls and cries of frustration. Beth could barely glimpse her feet below the sliver of vision at the edge of the bag covering her face.

"I get it." Beth huffed as they shoved her into the alleyway behind the club, her ankles nearly buckling when tugged towards a dark vehicle. "No need to be so rough."

Beth scoffed as he ignored her, the alcohol thinning her patience and control. "Silent treatment huh? Rio tell you not to talk? Lap dog."

She felt the pause in their step before she was violently shoved into the trunk of the vehicle.   
  


* * *

"I got you a gift."

"I’d ask what’s wrong with you but I already know." Beth snarked while combing her messy hair off her forehead. "You’re a drama queen." 

"You're always saying I don't help." He smirked the way that made Beth’s stomach tighten up with want. "That's me helping. This right here? That's your problem." He kicked Turner’s foot before circling around to watch her reaction. "Take care of it."

"Been there done that buddy." Beth yanked the ties from her wrists and tossed it aside. "And it doesn’t work out for you by the way."

"Oh yeah? How’s that?"

Rolling her eyes, Beth crossed her arms over her chest and decided it couldn’t hurt. "Well you’re gonna give me your gun and we’ll argue."

"Oh so you psychic now, ma?"

"Yes." Beth hissed at his smug grin and easy drawl. "I know all about your plans."

Rio’s hooded eyes narrowed as she glared at him, his lean body stepping closer. "You think you know a lot, mama."

"I know it _all_." Her words were snapped through curled lips. "I know you like me under your thumb and this whole shitshow is some twisted power play."

"Ain’t no power play, baby. I’m helping you clean up your mess." Rio sneered at her flushed cheeks and brilliant eyes. "He knows your entire bag of tricks, darling what you do, who you are. He even knows what makes your garden grow."

Beth slapped his hand away as he tried to grab her wrist, her feet stepping backwards. 

"Oh. my bad. Yeah, I might've let that last one slip. Now, a guy like that can't let that slide. How does that saying go? Cockle shells, silver bells, bodies all in a row? Ain't that right, boss?"

Beth couldn’t take the repetition any longer, the idea that nothing mattered was slowly driving her crazy. 

"I’m not shooting him, Rio. Not again."

"Wha?" He started before shaking his head and shoving the gun into her hand."Come on. Just like we practiced."

Beth shook her head but grasped the handgun tightly in her palm. 

"You got this." he flashed her a cheeky grin as he gestured towards Turner with his sharp jawline. "Come on. Do it."

Something deep and dark snapped inside her, a part that had begun to harden over the last handful of repetitive days. It was sharp and cold, the raw edges too deep and wide to smother any longer. 

Beth stared at him with watery blue eyes and flushed cheeks, her body trembling with adrenaline as her hand lifted from her side. She pointed the gun at Turner for a moment as she spoke, "He isn’t the problem."

"Put your big girl panties on and do it, Elizabeth. Clean up your mess." Rio growled, his eyes turning darker by the second. Beth couldn’t take it any longer. It seemed as though she would never escape the torture of reliving the worst day of her life. She’d tried everything, the utter despair of realizing that no matter what she did, she’d always wake up to see the same day was too much.

All of those thoughts and feelings bubbled up as Rio snapped at her again, pushing her to kill the man bound at their feet.

"Killing him doesn't fix it." Her voice began to to shake under the strain of her nerves. "killing you doesn’t either."

Beth didn’t even realize the gun was pressed against her temple until she looked up at Rio’s expression.

Rio’s eyes darkened at her words, his jaw rocking as the gun rose to her own head. 

"Whatcha doin’, ma?" He drawled, his jaw tight. "You think you can escape this shit? Naw. Point it at who needs it."

Beth ground her teeth together and pressed the barrel harder against her skull. "I am." She rasped, blinking past the tears filling her eyes. "I do."

"Elizabeth." Rio’s voice had turned softer but firmer. "Put the gun down."

"No." She snapped, stepping back as he approached. "Maybe this’ll work. Maybe it’ll all be over if I do it."

"That what you want?" He asked, his head tilting a bit as he looked her over. "You givin’ up? You want all them babies to know their mama would rather be dead then watch ’em grow up?"

"It doesn’t matter. I’ll never see it." Beth growled, her teeth bared and cheeks flush. "You’re doing all this to take me away from them anyways. You put it all on me. You always put it all on me. And this whole thing. You’re just trying to pin murder on me."

"I’m trying to help you." He barked. 

"No, you’re tryin to get me on film killing an _FBI agent_." Beth shouted, glancing at the camera on the ceiling. "I know all about your fucking scheme Rio. I know everything about everything now and I know that you’ll never fucking stop. So maybe this is it. Maybe this’ll make you stop, maybe I can finally get some peace. Maybe you’ll finally see you can’t make me kill anyone but _myself_."

She watched his jaw rock, the sharp angle jutting out as he glared at her.

"Not fun, huh?" Beth spat. "Not having the upper hand for once."

"Oh, mama. I always have the upper hand." He took a step forward, his hand out. "Now give it over."

"No." Her voice was wrecked, the words merely a hoarse croak.

"Maybe." She murmured passed the lump in her throat, her finger curling over the cold metal tigger with grim determination. "Maybe it’s the only way out."

"Elizabeth.." His voice was drowned out by the sharp crack of gunfire. She registered the loud sound and glimpsed Rio’s look of surprise before things went dark.

* * *

_I see a bad moon a-rising_

_ I see trouble on the way _

_ I see earthquakes and lightnin' _

_ I see bad times today _

_ Don't go 'round tonight _

_ It's bound to take your life _

_ There's a bad moon on the rise _


	3. Chapter 3

_I see a bad moon a-rising_

_I see trouble on the way_

_I see earthquakes and lightnin'_

_I see bad times today_

_Don't go 'round tonight_

_It's bound to take your life_

_There's a bad moon on the rise_

Beth laid in bed, as her phone played what had become her death march. The flashes of Rio’s shocked expression as she pulled the trigger kept replaying. The piercing sound that followed still rang in her ear. Slowly Beth raised her hand to her temple, her fingers trembling as she searched the silky smooth skin for injury. There was no sign of the attempt she’d made on her own life.

Beth just couldn’t take it any longer. It seemed as though she would never escape the torture of reliving the worst day of her life. She’d tried everything. The utter despair of realizing that no matter what she did, she’d always wake up to see the same day was too much.

All of those thoughts and feelings bubbled up when Rio snapped at her, pushing her to kill the man bound at their feet.

Beth hadn’t even realize the gun was pressed against her temple until she looked up at Rio’s expression.

She almost couldn’t believe she’d done it, but she most definitely wasn’t surprised that she woke up to the same old song. Her heart felt both heavy and vacant. A cold numbness snuffing out everything inside her like water over flame.

* * *

Beth strayed out into the kitchen and began making coffee. Her motions were practiced as she operated on autopilot. She glanced over her shoulder as Dean entered the kitchen scrubbing his face.

"You’re up early."

"Same time as every single other day." She replied dryly, the spoon clacking loudly as she stirred her coffee.

"You okay, Bethie?"

"Yes, Dean."

"You can tell me stuff. I know.. I know we aren’t what we were but I think we can still be friends."

"Friends don’t lie about having cancer." Beth wasn’t sure if it was residual anger from the evening before or the sad despair slowly killing her, but the harsh words spewed from her lips.

Dean’s eyes widened at the statement, the conversation about his horrible lie finally resurfacing. "Beth."

"Why Dean? Why that?" The idea that she’d cried over the news heating her blood up despite the time that had passed. "After everything with my mother. Watching her wither."

"I couldn’t lose you." He mumbled, his steps faltering as she put a hand up. 

"You mean, you couldn’t lose the perfect little wife, in the perfect little house. Making perfect little sandwiches, ironing your shirts and folding your underwear."

"No, that’s n-”

"It is." Beth snapped, her finger jabbing in his direction angrily. "You wanted me at home so you could fuck your secretary. Oh wait, I’m sorry secretaries."

Dean slouched against the countertop and confessed, "I know I screwed up, Bethie. You didn’t deserve any of it."

"You didn’t deserve me." She spoke with such conviction that she realized it was the first time she’d ever actually felt the words. The girls had said them, she’d even repeated them but it was the first time she truly believed them.

"I know." His choked on his words, the tears in his eyes only making her hate him more. Because after everything she still wouldn’t change her past, not if it meant she didn’t have her babies.

* * *

Beth drove her mini van towards the city, her mind muddled by the heavy conversations with Dean. She couldn’t believe it’d taken her so long to throw all the hurt and anger in her husband’s face but felt light for doing it.

So light that she’d gotten in her vehicle with a new determination to do things she’d always wanted to do. Now that repercussions didn’t matter, Beth was going to let loose.

The van’s brakes squeaked as she parked outside the bank she and the girls had cased previously. The idea of the robbery had excited her when she had planned it but they’d found other means to get the money that wasn’t risking their lives. Now she didn’t have to worry about that, now she could ignore the fear of being caught and do what felt good.

* * *

"Everybody freeze this is a robbery!" Beth shouted, her hand pointing the fake toy gun with way too much bravado. "Customers on the ground. Don’t make any moves. You won’t get hurt if you do as I say!"

She herded the few customers towards the counters, waving the gun over them as the clerks stood with their hands raised.

"You." She snapped, pointing the plastic pistol at a man with a mustache and tie. "You’re the manager?"

"Yes."

"Empty the drawers." She tossed a backpack at him. "Hit the alarm and I’ll put a round between your eyes. Got it?"

"Got it." He stammered, his hands shaking as he unlocked the cash drawers."

"Hurry, hurry, hurry." She shouted as he seemed to slow with every till. "No time to lallygag. I got places to be!"

Beth heard the swish sound of a sent text message, the phone in the hands of a woman laying on the ground.

Beth growled, stomping over to take the device from the woman who looked terrified. "That wasn’t very nice." She mocked, glancing down at the message sent to someone named Tim telling him to call the cops. "Does Tim know you can’t listen to directions?"

"Yes?" The woman’s voice trembled as she peered up at the gun in Beth’s hand. "Please, don’t shoot. I’m pregnant."

Beth’s heart stuttered at the statement, guilt flooding her as she looked down towards the woman’s curved stomach. She swallowed thickly as she took the phone and set it on the countertop.

"Keep still." She ordered with her teeth ground against the shame. "I don’t want to hurt you."

The bank manager handed off the backpack over the teller counter, allowing Beth to grasp the straps. She backed away from the group, her hand waving the gun over them. "Count to 100 before you move or my guys outside will pick you off like thanksgiving day turkeys. You got it?"

The door slammed after her, the bank alarm going off instantly. Beth jogged over to her van and hopped inside, the keys turning over with a loud rev as she floored the gas pedal. She’d just peeled out and turned a corner when the siren sounds came closer.

"Shit." She cursed as she passed by the cop cars coming to the scene, her eyes staying straight as they sped passed her.

Her heart was hammering hard with excitement, the thrill of getting away with such a blatant crime making her grin in satisfaction. Her hands curled around the steering wheel as she bounced in her seat and squealed happily.

"Oh my god." Beth chuckled, shaking her head in disbelief. She couldn’t believe she’d just robbed a bank in broad daylight. She only wished the girls could see her now.

Who was she kidding, she wished Rio witnessed just how much of a boss bitch she was now.

* * *

The clothing fit her like a glove, the silky dress accenting every curve and dip on her hourglass figure. She felt the eyes of several business men follow her as she swayed her way through the crowd to the sleek marble bar top. The bartender was greeting her instantly, his eyes landing on the uncharacteristic amount of cleavage she was showing off. The emerald cut diamond necklace she purchased to replace the one she’d loved all that time ago was tucked tantalizingly in the deep crease. Just thinking of the last time she wore it wrecked her, Rio’s hand heavy on the back of her neck as he growled against her ear.

_"Is that emerald cut?  
_ _How much of my money did that set you back?"_

Shaking off the heady memory, Beth rolled her blue eyes and ordered a top shelf bourbon.

The modern building was nestled in downtown Detroit’s business district, the venue a hotspot for the lawyers and stock market crowds happy hour.

Beth didn’t have much in mind other than enjoying the money she’d taken from the bank earlier that afternoon. She’d spent most on her new wardrobe but a large chunk of it went to several pampering treatments at the spa near the boutique she’d shopped at. Her body was massaged, waxed smooth and moisturized by the most luxurious shea butters and body oils. Beth had never felt so sexy and couldn’t help but go out for a celebratory drink.

"Not everybody can afford this, let only drink it without a wince." The bartender remarked, his hands braced on the marble as she took a dainty sip. Her eyes trailed over the tan skin of his forearms, her gaze catching at the way his rolled shirt sleeves highlighted the toned muscles flexing.

"I’m not everybody." She replied with a coy smile curling her painted red lips.

"No, no you aren’t." He drawled, his voice nowhere close to the desirable grit Rio’s had but it was close enough to make her crossed legs tighten. 

"I’m Eric and you are?"

Her lips were poised to reply with something hopefully close to sounding sexy when a large hand slid across her lower back.

"Elizabeth."

The shiver that ran down her spine couldn’t be concealed, the smirk pulling at Rio’s full lips saying as much. "Sorry I’m late, sweetheart."

Bartender forgotten, Beth bit her lip as she looked over his slim-cut button down shirt and dark slacks. She hadn’t ever gotten much time to enjoy looking at him all these days she’d replayed, the heat it caused not totally surprising.

"Guess you’ll have to make it up to me." Beth spoke soft and flirty, her chest rising a little too fast to hold her facade of calm.

"Mmm." Rio’s inked throat rumbled in consideration, his head cocking a bit to bring his mouth closer to her ear. The crisp scent of his cologne hit her nose, the smell warming her blood and increasing the aching need she had for him.

"Whatchu want, darlin’?" His breath was hot on her neck as he brushed his nose along the shell of her ear. "Flowers. Chocolates."

What did she want? She wanted everything to go back to normal. She wanted the night to end without gunfire and blood.

Beth clenched her teeth at the sudden spike of grief that hit her square in the chest. The gaping hole that had been slowly growing inside her all raw and exposed. She’d ignored all the darkness for most of the day, her mind focused on enjoying herself but just as things seemed to be cresting into something amazing, Beth went plummeting into despair.

Rio must have noticed her mood’s complete one-eighty, his head pulling back to see her stricken expression. "Elizabeth."

"I want." Beth swallowed thickly as he stared at her with knowing eyes. "Something I can’t have."

Rio stared for a solid uncomfortable moment before he stood from his bar stool, his hand held out towards her. "C’mon, ma."

Her heart dropped as she realized it was about that time. He had to have gotten Turner into the loft already, his next stop being her house.

"How’d you find me?" She asked as she took his hand and followed him out of the bar willingly. There wasn’t any point in fighting what was to come. It was inevitable.

"Find my friends." He replied with a grin. "You really should watch how much of your personal data you give out. Can be dangerous, mami."

  
  


* * *

The walk to the car was short, his shiny Cadillac parked just down the street from the bar in an alleyway. The streets were silent, the only sound she could hear were the click of her stilettos and the drum of her heartbeat.

When they arrived at his car, Rio opened the passenger door and gestured for her to get in.

"Can we just not do this tonight?" Beth asked as she stepped towards the open door.

"Do what, ma? Just giving you a ride."

"We both know that’s not true, Rio." She replied, his name falling from her lips freezing him for a second. The only times she’d said it was during their rendezvous.

"What do you know, Elizabeth?" He stepped closer, his chest brushing against hers as his hand came up to brush a stray curl behind her ear.

"I know that you want to kiss me more than kill me." She murmured with hooded eyes.

"Yeah?"

"Yeah." She let her eyes trail over his inked neck and sharp jaw, his pouty lip begging for her to nip and suck on it.

"And what do you want, mama?" Rio’s voice was a low gravel, the sound pushing a rush of heat through her core and dampening her panties.

"You." Beth whispered with fluttered eyes. "I always want you."

"To bad it’s over and done huh?" He drawled with a flash of anger clouding his dark eyes.

Beth reached forward as he tried to step away, her fingers curling into his shirt to keep him close. "I didn’t mean it."

"You still said it."

"I’m a liar." Beth’s jaw clenched at the admission. It was one of the first times she’d ever admitted it out loud.

She’d been a liar since childhood. It started out of self preservation. Lying to their schools about where her mom was at parent teacher conferences. She’d lie to their mother about how she got the food their table, which often meant she was stealing a car and shoplifting bread and peanut butter. She’d been lying to Dean about loving him for years to keep her family together. Clinging to her life with him like she wanted to be treated like a stepford wife.

Beth had been stealing and lying in some way to get what her family needed for her entire life. Lying came natural to her, sometimes she wouldn’t even realize she was doing it until half way through. More often than not she would even begin to believe them.

"First step is admitting you got a problem." Rio’s snark caused her defenses to rise up but she shoved them down in an attempt to change the evening’s events.

"So when are you going to admit it?"

"Admit what? I ain’t no liar, ma."

"Omitting the truth is the same thing."

"Nah, I tell you what you need to know. That’s your problem. You think you deserve to know everything."

"I do when it affects me. You lied about the drugs, tried to sneak it in under my nose."

"Get in the car, Elizabeth."

"No."

"Get in, or I’ll put you in the trunk." He snapped.

Beth clenched her teeth at his tone and felt her fingernails bite into her palms.

"Fine." She growled before stepping away to open the back door.

"Elizabeth.."

Beth slid inside, leaving the door open as she asked, "Well, are you going to join me?"

She saw him freeze, his hand gripping the door as he peered inside after her. Beth cocked an eyebrow in question as he pulled out his phone and sent a quick text message. A smile curled her lips as she realized he was probably getting someone to babysit Turner while he was delayed.

"You have somewhere to be?" She asked coyly, her tongue darting across her lip as he climbed inside and shut the door.

"Whatchu doin’, mama?" His voice was low and rough, his eyes trailed down her exposed legs as her skirt bunched up. "That hubby not scratchin’ your itch."

"He hasn’t scratched anything of mine in five years, Rio." She confessed while reaching to remove her shoes.

"Leave ‘em on." He rasped as he watched her squirm. "Show me your panties."

"Don’t say _panties_." Beth quipped with a smile pulling at her red lips.

"Why? It making you wet?" His voice became rougher as he watched her hike her dress up, the navy lacy strip of cloth between her thighs exposed. "Should stuff them in that big mouth of yours, shut you up for once."

"You don’t want me to shut up." Beth retorted as she cupped herself, her fingers pushing against her clit as she whimpered. "You like my mouth too much."

Rio’s eyes were burning a scorched path over her body, his bottom lip hanging low as he wet it.

"That right?"

"Yes." She hissed as her fingers dipped passed the lace and into the wet folds below.

"Fuck." He grit out before lurching forward into her space, tearing her hand away to replace it with his own. "You think you know everything."

"Yes!" She moaned out, her head thrown back as he gripped the crotch of her panties and snapped the fabric with one vicious yank. She watched him ball them up with a mean looking grin.

"Open." He demanded, his hand working between her legs.

Beth widened her legs but froze as he clarified. "Other lips, baby."

Her mouth parted in shock which gave him enough room to shove the lacy fabric into her mouth, smearing her lipstick.

"Rio." She mumbled as the fabric filled her mouth.

"uh,uh." He growled, brushing his nose across her as he pressed closer to speak. "You gonna bite those until I’m done with you."

Beth clenched her teeth, the lace rough on her tongue and soft palate. She couldn’t stop the deep throaty moan that escaped when his fingers replaced hers though. The thick stretch of his rough knuckles pressing against her folds as he pumped into her.

His eyes were dark pits as he watched her, his gaze dipping over her body to watch his fingers disappear inside her.

"Fuck, you so wet, mami." He grunted, his other hand sliding up her hip to her breast. "Show me them titties."

Beth moaned at the demand, her hand finding the zipper of her dress instantly. She watched him with doe eyes, her throat bobbing as she swallowed against the gag in her mouth.

"Fuck." He hissed through clenched teeth, his jaw rocking as she exposed the new brassier holding her girls high and proud. "Like a fucking dream, ma."

His thumb brushed across the stiff nipples showing below the thin fabric. "Think about these every night. Them bouncing when you rode my dick."

"Fuck." She cursed against the fabric shoved in her mouth, her needy sound bringing his eyes up.

"You think about it?"

Beth nodded vigorously, her legs spreading further as his hand pumped into her harder at the confession.

"Yeah? Whatchu think about?"

Rio chuckled lowly as she moaned into the gag. "Yeah I bet you picture me fuckin’ you on your knees. Bouncing that ass off my dick."

Beth panted heavily as he kept pumping his curled fingers, the swivel of his wrist sliding his thumb across her clit. He tugged the cup of her bra down enough to release the tight bud below. She keened as he rolled it hard between his fingers, the feeling sending a shudder through her whole body. Rio moaned against her neck, his lips and teeth tasting her neck and breast.

"You like it when I grab these tetas as you fuck you out." He rasped before flicking his tongue over her nipple.

Beth clawed at his shoulders and ribs, her legs spread wide as he pushed a third finger inside her. His hot wet mouth latched onto her breast, sucking hard in rhythm with his thrusting fingers.

"Yes." Beth moaned into the gag, digging her nails into his shoulders. Her hips rose from the seat as she clenched and shuddered around him, cumming hard around his crooked fingers.

"Fuck." He cursed into her cleavage, his fingers swirling inside to rub the spot that made her writhe. "That’s it mami. feel good?"

"Mmhm."

"Yeah you do." He flicked his thumb hard while pressing in as deep as he could go.

"Rio." Beth couldn’t stop mumbled into the lace fabric snuffing out her words. Everything felt overwhelmingly good. After everything she’d gone through in however many days it’d been, the sensation of feeling alive was amazing.

Rio pulled the fabric from her mouth and kissed her deeply. She clung to him as he spread her legs while unbuckling his jeans. They panted into each other’s mouths as his dick pressed against her wet core.

"Sure?" He rasped hoarsely, his eyes flicking over her face before drifting down to the sight of his skin against hers. A beautiful contrast of tan and cream.

"Very." Beth replied, her words turning into wanton moans when he pressed into her instantly. 

"You gonna kick me outta my own car after?" He rumbled, licking his lips as he smeared the head of his dick across her hood.

Beth shook her head slowly, her fingers pulling at his hips. "Please."

"Damn, ma." Rio stared down between her legs, his long fingers and strong hands framing her hips as he rocked against her. "Look good on my dick."

"Yeah."

"Yeah." He huffed out a breath after a harder, deeper thrust.

"More."

"More?" His voice turned gruffer, his hands tightening around her curves. "You want me to tear it up, huh?"

"Fuck." She threw her head back against the seat as he began pumping into her with no restraint. She could feel the car rocking with every dominating thrust, his fingers bruising her hips and breasts.

"You feel me?"

"Rio."

"Tell me, ma. ‘Fore we get locked up for indecent exposure."

"So good." Beth panted, her tongue darting out to lick her smeared lips. "you fuck me so good, Rio."

"Goddamnit." Rio hiked her knee over his shoulder and laid into her spread legs. Beth shattered around him, her walls clenching frantically around his the swollen head. Rio’s own groans filled the car, his hips stuttering into hers as he came as well.

Fingers began to brush the hair from her temple out of her eyes, his thumb stroking the flushed skin of her cheek.

"Got a dirty mouth, Elizabeth."

"Only, because you put panties in it."

Rio threw his head back and laughed freely, his eyes crinkled as he grinned at her. "You liked it. Pussy was melting all over my interior."

Beth could feel her face redden at the comment, her eyes suddenly going to the leather seats.

"Don’t worry, ma." He chuckled, pulling her hand his mouth. "Get it cleaned all the time, Pop’s always spillin’ shit back here."

"You let him eat in the car?"

"’Course. Ain’t that big of an asshole." He scoffed.

Beth cocked an eyebrow at the comment, making them both chuckle.

"Aight, I’ll give you that one."

"I mean you were sending me body parts in the mail."

"You don’t like edible arrangements?"

"Eww." Beth smacked his shoulder playfully as she redressed. "Don’t be gross."

His laugh was low and warm, his lips curled just enough to crease his eyes. "You like it."

"No." She rolled her eyes and combed her fingers through her hair. "I don’t like it."

"What do you like?" His head was resting against the seat, his eyes trailing over her body as she smoothed down her dress. Beth’s eyes rose to his, her lip pulled between her teeth.

"You." She spoke softly, her blue eyes wide and vulnerable.

Rio watched her carefully, his jaw rocking slightly at her response. She could see him shutting down at the confession, his expression clearing of humor. Beth grabbed his wrist when he made a move to open the door.

"Wait."

"Got shit to do, ma." He replied gruffly, his eyes narrowed and jaw tight.

"Please." She felt desperate to keep the evening from going where he was trying to lead it. "Wait."

"What?" Rios voice turned harder as he pulled his arm from hers.

"Look, can we just not go do what you have planned for me? Can we just take a night to talk."

"Nothin’ to talk about." He moved to grasp the door handle again but Beth clung to his arm and shoulder.

"Wait, please, Rio." She wasn’t above begging at that point, she needed him to finally listen. "I have to tell you something."

Rio’s eyes narrowed as she spoke, his shoulders and jaw tightening in anticipation. "Whatchu do now?"

"No, it’s not..." Beth shook her head and decided to go for it. "I know about Turner."

The car was dead quiet for a moment as Rio looked her over critically. "What about him?"

"I know he’s at your loft. I know you’re gonna try to get me to kill him."

"Yeah?" He asked roughly, pulling her hand away from the sleeve of his shirt. "How do you know that?"

"Because I’ve been reliving this day for.. I don’t know how many days and anything you do or I do or anyone else does, doesn’t change it. I always wake up to the same day."

Rio looked at her for a solid minute before chuckling lowly. "Didn’t think you drank that much, ma."

"I’m not drunk." Beth snapped in frustration, her hand tucking hair behind her ear. "It’s the truth. I’ve tried everything to fix it but it’s always September 18th. It’s not always the same, I can change some things but it always ends the same. Someone dies and I wake up to relive it all over again."

"You actually believe this shit?" Rio spoke cautiously, his eyes flicking over her distraught expression and clenched hands. "If you know so much, what happens when we leave here?"

"This is the first time we..." she felt the traitorous blush color her cheeks.

"Ain’t the first time we fucked ma."

"No I mean today.. tonight. We hadn’t before." Beth shook her head in frustration. "Look normally you kidnap me and take me to your loft. We fight, you yell and I yell and then... someone always gets hurt."

"Someone?" Rio rasped lowly, his eyes darkening as he stared intensely.

"Yes." Beth’s voice is soft and cautious. She didn’t exactly want to confess to shooting him, but there was no way to avoid it. "Sometimes... it’s you. Sometimes Turner. Once Turner shot you. Last time... it was me."

"You sayin’ you shot me, mami?" He asked gruffly, his hand reaching into his waist band to pull out his handgun. "You pop that cherry finally?"

"Rio."

"You tried to kill the king." Rio reached out to grip the back of her neck, his gun tucked below her jaw. "Hmm?"

The sensation of the cold metal on her jaw brought the last evening back in full force. Her mind flashed to the stunned look on Rio’s face when she pointed the gun at herself and pulled the trigger.

"I protected myself." She hissed, pushing the gun from her jaw. "Stop pointing that at me."

"Should be used to it by now, Elizabeth. If the shit you say is true."

"It is true." She exclaimed, throwing a hand up. "Why would I make this up?"

"You said it yourself, mama. You a liar."

Beth ground her teeth and glared at him. "I’m not lying about this."

"Yeah? So after you shoot me, what happens?" His growl and heated expression tells her to tread lightly.

"I wake up."

"That’s all. Curtains close and you just wake up."

"Yes."

"I don’t believe you."

"Fine." She snapped, her cheeks flushed in frustration. He was always pulling more information out of her, she always bent to him and she hated it.

"I go home and pass out and then wake up."

"So you kill me and leave me to rot?" The tone he spoke in was filled with cold malice. "That about right?"

"I don’t want to. Turner practically shoved me out the door."

Rio chuckled darkly, his hand tightening around his gun. "Oh I see, you leave me with a pig."

"Rio."

"Nah." His voice was hoarse and mean. "Enough of this bullshit. We got shit to do."

"It’s not bullshit, it’s happened and I want to change it. I don’t want anyone to get hurt. I want to wake up to a new day. I just..."

Beth’s throat closes on the emotions bubbling up out of her, shaking her head as tears flood her eyes. "I just want it to be over."

"Yeah, ma." He nodded his head, tipping his chin up. "You always do but you gotta learn sometime. Ain’t no one else cleaning up your messes no more. You gotta put your big girl panties on and take care of business."

"I have." She cried out in frustration, her hands fisted in her lap. "I’ve tried. I killed him, nothing changed. I even killed..."

"Who?" He asked with a mocking grin. "Who else you killed, mami? You out taking care of everybody in your way?"

"Myself, okay!" She snapped through clenched teeth and watery eyes. "Me!"

Rio’s face was almost as shocked as it had been when she pulled the trigger with the gun at her temple.

"Whatchu mean?"

"I mean, I took care of myself. I took that gun and blew my damn brains out and it did nothing. Nothing fucking matters. It just repeats and I can’t take it anymore." She cried, her hands covering her face to hide the tears overflowing and smearing her makeup. "I can’t do this anymore. I can’t, Rio. I can’t. I-I c-can’t"

Rio’s hands were pulling her closer, one sinking into her hair as the other spread wide across her back. "Sh,sh,sh."

"I can’t." She gasped, her whole body trembling against him. "I can’t do this."

"Easy, ma." His lips brushed along her cheek as he spoke low and calm. "Breathe, sweetheart."

"I can’t."

"Yeah, you can."

Beth took in a slow shuddered breath, the exhale jagged and wet.

"There’s my girl." His hand was sliding up and down her back, his voice a low rumble against her ear. Beth breathed in and out slowly until the sobs escaping stopped and her tears dried up.

"Here’s what we’re gonna do." He informed as he pulled back to look over her blotchy face and wet eyes. "You and me are gonna wait it out."

"Wait what out?"

"You say you wake up to the same day, yeah?"

"Yes." She huffed.

"Aight." He nodded firmly, while putting his gun away and making his way to the front seat. "We’re gonna watch the sunrise to a new day then, ma."

"Rio."

"What? You try this already?"

"Well, no."

"Aight then. We do this and tomorrow we work this shit out." Rio explained, turned the car on. After a minute of driving he met her eyes in the rearview mirror. "So I gotta keep you awake or something?"

"I don’t have a concussion." She scoffed.

"You sure?" He cocked an eyebrow at her, "It would explain some shit."

* * *

Beth rest against his side as they leaned on the iron railing. They stood on a bridge over the passing river, their gaze facing east. The subtle hints of dawn were approaching, a navy tinge starting to paint the horizon.

"What is this place?"

"A bridge."

"Rio." She wasn’t proud of the whine in her voice but couldn’t stop it from happening. For once she would like to get an answer out of him without an interrogation.

He shrugged lazily, his jaw tensing as he chewed on his answer a moment. "Place I go to think."

"Why’d you bring me?"

"Why do you ask so many questions?"

Beth rolled her eyes and turned them back to the slow moving water. She couldn’t stop from resting her temple against the warmth of his shoulder. The air was colder above the river and the chill of it had her shivering.

"C’mere, ma." He pulled her in front of him, his arms circling her waist to warm her up. Her lungs hitched as he tucked his face against her neck, breathing hot air against her skin. "Better."

"Much." She sighed, resting her back into his broad chest. Rio rubbed her arms and brought her icy fingers up to his mouth.

"Why’re you doing this?" Beth bit her tongue after the words spilled from her mouth. She wished she could stuff them back in side when he tensed up behind her.

"Still askin’ questions." Rio commented, his hands resting on her hips. His lips brushed against her neck making her tilted her head to offer more skin.

"What can I say, you’re a questionable person." She retorted softly, her heart clenching as he chuckled gruffly against her ear. The raspy sound melting her back into his chest. They’d never been anything close to cuddlers but standing there as pink began to bloom across the sky felt natural.

"Been called worse."

Beth snorted, turning her face to kiss the edges of the ink on his throat. "Don’t brag."

His tugged her closer, a deep satisfied sound rumbled through his chest against her back as she nuzzled underneath his jaw.

"You got a way of gettin’ what you want from me, ma." He finally replied, the rough stubble of his jaw brushing along her neck. "Got me on a hook."

Beth turned around to peer up at him, her cold hands sliding up his chest to wrap behind his neck.

"You think you’re the only one?" She spoke cautiously, her blue eyes wide and vulnerable as he pressed her against the railing. The sun was slowly rising behind her, the warmth of it heating her back as Rio warmed the front. "I don’t break into just anyone’s place."

"Yeah?" He nudged the bridge of her nose with his own, wetting his pouty bottom lip. "Whatchu sayin’, mama?"

"You know." She breathed against his mouth as he teased her with a kiss.

"Wanna hear it."

"I want you."

"Yeah? What else?" Rio’s hands slide down her hips to grab her ass.

"I need you."

Beth heard and felt the breath in his lungs catch at the sentence she sighed against his throat. She couldn’t help but repeat herself to try an illicit the same response.

"I need you, Rio."

"Fuck, mama." His hand rose to hold her throat and jaw, titling her face up towards his. "See it’s shit like that, that makes me stupid."

* * *

They’d watched the sunrise, Beth feeling settled for the first time in too many days. Soon they moved back to his vehicle, their mood subdued as they climbed inside. Beth glanced at him as they pulled onto the road, heading towards her home. She leaned back into the leather seat and let her eyes trace his face as he drove. The evening had turned into something completely different than any before it. It had her hopeful for a fresh start. The car moved smoothly, the subtle rocking of it turning her eyes heavy. Blinking hard, her tried to keep her eyes open but soon it was just too much.

* * *

_I see a bad moon a-rising_

_I see trouble on the way_

_I see earthquakes and lightnin'_

_I see bad times today_

_Don't go 'round tonight_

_It's bound to take your life_

_There's a bad moon on the rise_

Beth blinked several times as her room came into focus, a sharp and sudden feeling of grief filling her chest. She could still feel the subtle movement of Rio’s car, the smell of leather and his cologne still in her nose.

The emptiness of her room was suffocating. Clenching her eyes shut she felt the telltale burn of tears filling them. Beth curled up into a tight ball, pulling the comforter over her head to muffle the sobs tearing up her throat into the heavy cotton and down.

The uncompromising sadness of it all was wrecking her more everyday, but losing the evening she’d just had with Rio was utterly heartbreaking.


	4. Chapter 4

_ I see a bad moon a-rising _

_ I see trouble on the way _

_ I see earthquakes and lightnin' _

_ I see bad times today _

_ Don't go 'round tonight _

_ It's bound to take your life _

_ There's a bad moon on the rise _

The dive bar Beth entered was nothing like _the bar_ , it wasn’t trendy or filled with millennials. It’s bartop didn’t gleam in the mid-morning sunlight or exude a heady warmth at night. The wood paneling wasn’t a polished oak, rather cheap laminate and the wall of bottles didn’t have top-shelf anything. 

It felt perfect after the last attempt of freeing herself, something unfamiliar and unkempt. Nothing like Rio or the time they’d spent sitting comfortably sipping high-end liquor while eye fucking each other. 

Beth sidled up to the black counter, the wood painted a dozen times over to cover the carved initials and curse words. It was the type of hole in the wall that Annie would frequent and be kicked out of. 

Rolling her eyes at the thought, she gave the bartender a tight smile as she ordered. "Bourbon, please."

"Four bucks." The tired looking women replied, sloshing the watered down looking liquor into a glass. 

"Can I start a tab? I’m gonna be a while."

"No tabs. Four bucks." The woman spoke dryly, her hand sliding the glass just out of reach.

"Jesus, Dolores give ‘er a break. Aint nobody dine and dashin’ in this shit hole." A man grumbled nearby, his voice rough from smoking. 

"It’s okay, here." Beth pulled out a twenty and said, "I’ll take this many please."

The man knocked his knuckles on the bartop and wagged a finger at Beth, "a woman after my own heart. Line ‘em up, Dolores."

Beth sighed as he slid into the seat next to her. "Listen I’m not looking for _company_."

"That’s fine." He threw back a shot of whiskey. "I’m not either."

She huffed out a breath before sipping from her first glass of bourbon. The bottom tier liquor scorched a path down her throat and lit her chest on fire like gasoline but it didn’t stop her from throwing the rest back. 

"Thatta girl." He chuckled gruffly next to her, his elbows on the bartop and shoulders slumped forward. "Nothing that can’t be cured by some good ol’ gut rot."

"You talk a lot for a guy not looking for company." Beth commented dryly giving him a irritated side-eye. 

The rough smoker laugh shook his shoulders as he tapped his glass on the counter signaling for another round. "And you listen a lot for someone hating it."

"Whatever." Beth sipped the next round, the liquid fire not burning as harshly as the first time. 

"Miles." He introduced himself with a lifted shot glass. 

"Beth." 

"So, Beth. Why this shithole of all the shitholes in this shithole city?"

Beth sipped her drink before answering with the burn of liquor roughing up her voice. "Why do you care?"

"I don’t really, just making conversation."

"Well, why don’t you keep your conversation to yourself? Nobody’s interested."

"Someone’s bitter."

"Someone needs to mind their own business and get a life." 

Miles laughed roughly until it turned into a painful sounding cough. Beth wrinkled her nose at the sound, shifting in her seat uncomfortably as it continued for a long moment. 

"Are you okay?" She finally asked as he caught his breath, his mouth roughly wiped across his flannel sleeve. 

"Yeah." He cleared his throat, a short laugh escaping his throat before he explained. "I don’t recommend lung cancer. She’s a real bitch."

"Oh." Beth cringed at her careless words. "I’m sorry."

"Hey, you didn’t put the cigarette in my mouth in grade school. Shit was all me." He offered, lifting his drink to his mouth with a wry smirk. "Don’t apologize for making me laugh, I prefer your bitchy attitude than meaningless platitudes."

Beth huffed at the statement. "I’m not a bitch."

"Bitchy’s good. Most people turn all weepy when I tell ‘em about the big C." Miles shrugged his shoulders. "Rather not waste what little time I have left with bullshit pleasantries."

"Okay." Beth replied feeling a little off balance with the conversation. She didn’t know how to respond to someone so blatantly talking about their own demise. 

"So." He coaxed after a long silence. "Why this shit hole?"

"It was the first place I saw when I got off the interstate." Beth relented, her hands cupping her glass in front of her. 

"And the day drinking...?” He cocked his head a bit to the side. "Don’t seem like the usual type to spend their mid morning drinking swill."

"I’ve had a bad couple days." Beth rolled her eyes at the statement before amending. "Not as bad as you I guess."

"Hey, don’t knock my life. I’m livin’ the dream." Miles gave her a smile that could pass as genuine if it weren’t for the bitter tone of his words. "I can drink all day and night, say whatever comes into my mind and just blame it on the chemo brain."

"Should you be drinking while on chemo?"

"I said I can blame it on the chemo, not that I’m actually on chemo. People tend to fuck off when I whip out the cancer card."

"That’s just... wrong."

"As wrong as my insides being eaten alive by some cells that decided they liked my lungs for patè?"

"No... I guess not."

"So, I do what I want, when I want. Life gets a hell of a lot more interesting when you don’t worry about consequences."

The statement had Beth pausing mid sip, her glass poised at her lips.

"What?" Miles asked as she stared at him a moment. 

"Just... I know what you mean."

"Oh yeah?" He asked, leaning towards her a bit. "That why your day drinking? Forgetting the consequences?"

"Just forgetting in general."

"Ah. Life’s kicking you in the ol’ ballsack huh?"

Beth wrinkled her nose at the phrase but gave him a shrug in agreement. "I guess you could say that."

"Well, lay it on me."

"Oh, I don’t want to do that.. I mean.. you have..."

Miles raised an eyebrow as she waved her hand in his general direction. "I have...? What sexy brooding eyes and a strong jawline?"

Beth scoffed, "oh please, like anyone can see your jawline under that homeless man beard."

Miles laughed gruffly again, but made sure to keep it from starting a coughing fit again. "Yeah, well we both know hobo chic gets all the ladies."

Beth laughed lightly, shaking her head at the man sitting next to her. 

"See, I knew you had it in you."

"What?"

"A sense of humor." He quipped, his lips pulling up crookedly under the scruffy beard.

* * *

"So let me get this straight." Miles spoke with a slight slur after the numerous drinks they’d shared. "You wake up everyday to the same day. Live with no repercussions ‘n remember everything."

"You left out the part where somebody dies gruesomely."

"I mean, _do they_?” Miles face was pulled into what would be the equivalent of a shrug, “If the day resets every morning?"

"It doesn’t matter, I still have to live through it."

"Yeah but you get a do over. It’s not real life or death."

"That doesn’t mean I’m not emotionally scarred from it." Beth sighed, pushing her glass away. "I still have to experience it."

Miles rolled his eyes and threw back a shot of what looked like tequila. He coughed a bit from the burn as he retorted, "boo hoo. Feelings schmeelings. You want a tissue for that issue?"

"Says the guy weeping into his beard."

Miles laughed, knocking his knuckles on the table top. "Hey there’s no tears in this manly mane."

"If that’s what you wanna call it." Beth quipped with a smirk. "More like you glued roadkill to your face and call it a life style choice."

"Hey I’m not the one day drinking with a hobo. At least I got good taste in drinking partners."

"Yeah, your drinking with a crazy person who believes in time loops."

"Could be worse, you could be a religious zealot trying to save my soul from eternal damnation." He offered with a grin. 

Beth chuckled, shaking her head a bit as she let the alcohol warm her veins. "I guess that’s true."

"Look." He offered a few minutes later of companionable silence. "The way I see it, you’ve got endless time to do anything you want. Why’re you wasting it on some dying drunk in shithole bar? Seems to me you should be enjoying life."

"Easy for you to say."

"Believe me, if I had all the time in the world I wouldn’t be sitting here drowning my sorrows with watered down piss water."

"I guess."

"I would at least get some good shit to poison myself with." Miles grinned with a nod. "Then I’d probably go find the one that got away."

"And who would that be?"

"Marie Nolan." He smiled underneath his scruff, his eyes lightening a bit at the thought of her. "She sat in front of me in social economics class. She smelled like coffee and coconuts and used to laugh at my terrible jokes."

"You sure it was the jokes and not the beard?" Beth teased, her eyes sparkling as he scoffed back. 

"Yes." Miles growled playfully. "I’m a real funny guy."

"Sure, sure." Beth appeased him with a soft pat on his shoulder. "Of course you’re are."

Miles chuckled and continued without prompting. "We went out once, she’d just broken up with her ex and needed a kind ear."

"Sounds familiar." Beth replied dryly. "Did you force her to talk to you too?"

"I’m offend that you think so poorly of me."

"Yeah, well don’t blame me for your terrible personality traits."

"As I was saying." Miles huffed out, "we went out once and then she ended back with her turd of a boyfriend. I think they got married and had kids."

"That also sounds familiar." Beth muttered under her breath. 

"If I had the time and no consequences I would end up on her doorstep and I’d tell her all the cheesy shit I hadn’t. Like when she laughed her eyes would turn this bright green, like some damn grassy hill in Ireland. It always made my day."

"That’s sweet."

"Oh shut up." He scoffed, grabbing the pint of beer sitting nearby. "I’d be telling her not you."

"It’s still sweet."

"Whatever." Miles grunted, his shoulder shifting uncomfortably at her soft words. "Anyways, I would be living my life to the fullest is what I’m saying."

"So what? I just keep living the same day, experience the same pain?"

"No." Miles scoffed, his hand scratching at his beard. "You remember everything right? So skip the shit you don’t wanna experience and do what you want. You got the advantage right?"

Beth merely stared back at him as he raised his eyebrows. 

"You know what everyone’s gonna do before they do it, so use that shit. Go do the things you want to."

"Like what?"

"You tell me."

"I." Beth paused, her mouth slightly parted as she contemplated. "I always wanted to learn a second language."

"See." He asked, his finger wagging at her. "There you go. Learn something new. You got plenty of time. Spend it with all those rugrats you say you did this crazy shit for."

"Yeah, you’re right."

"No shit, Sherlock." He smiled at her, giving her elbow a friendly bump with his. "Save the sulking for us dying mortals."

* * *

_ I see a bad moon a-rising _

_ I see trouble on the way _

_ I see earthquakes and lightnin' _

_ I see bad times today _

_ Don't go 'round tonight _

_ It's bound to take your life _

_ There's a bad moon on the rise _

Beth sat on the bench at the park, her lips quirking as she watch the little blonde boy spill out of the slide, his laugh just as shrill as the first few dozen times she’d heard it. Time was passing, she knew by the exhaustion she felt, but the date stayed the same.

Beth was changing though, she could feel the weariness in her bones that never seemed to fade but also her resolve was slowly hardening. 

After spending the day and night drinking with Miles, she’d woken up determined to use the seemingly abundance of time she had more productively than committing crimes and drinking her liver away.

When the kids woke up she’d rounded them up and instead of Dean shuffling them off to school she announced they’d play hookie together. Dean was confused by her sudden relaxed mindset about the kids education but left her to it. Beth decided she would take them to the park for a day of fun and then pizza and ice cream. She’d realized she hadn’t spent as much time with her babies as she would like, her life bogged down with fake money, drugs, the FBI murder investigation and last but certainly not least, Rio. 

It all started with her need to provide for them. The grocery store, the secret shoppers. She wanted to say everything was for them but Beth knew she could’ve made different choices. There’s always a choice and hers was just over the line from needed into wanted. 

Craved. Ached. Lusted. 

With all of that in mind, Beth was going to make a concerted effort to spend what was her last day of many last days with her kids. She needed to go back to what it all was about. Her babies. 

* * *

" _Donde está la biblioteca?" _ Beth repeated after the audible book playing over the vans speakers, her eyes on the neighborhood in front of her. Gazing at the same people she’d seen repeatedly move about their day like every day before. The women in yellow was two seconds from dropping her coffee mug, the liquid bound for the joggers shoes as he knocked the her over. Beth cringed when the scene unfolded as she recalled but smiled as she watched the man fawn over her. His hands helping the woman from the ground, their eyes connecting as they spoke. She’d begun to enjoy the little interactions that no one but her seemed to notice. Subtle events that never seemed to change. 

" _Dónde está el baño?" _

Beth glanced at her clock and made a mental note of the time as Turner exited the police station with his partner. The first time she’d followed them, she’d lost sight in the morning traffic, but now she knew their exact route and timing. 

Turner and his partner slid into their vehicle, the black suv pulling out of the station’s parking lot. Beth ducked down in her seat as they drove passed, her hand turning the key in the ignition.

" _que hora es?_ " The accented voice asked over the scratchy speakers. 

"Time to get coffee." Beth replied, her foot pressing the gas pedal as she followed the pair through traffic. 

" _Dónde está la estación de policía?" _

QShe knew they would stop at the cafe on third avenue before they headed towards her house. The coffee cups they’d had with them on the last repeated day featured the shops name and trendy logo.

" _Sabes dónde está el hospital?” _

Beth looked down at her cellphone, the text from Dean coming through asking where she was. Beth hit send, the text she’d already composed for the question in the text box. 

"Running errands, be home tonight."

* * *

She was beginning to perfect the timing of events in her circumferential life, her steps always just ahead of Turner and Rio. It took a few tries but eventually she was able to outmaneuver them with a borrowed car and an early start. She figured out that if she stopped by Mrs. Nedimyers house at 6am she would be out getting her mail. With a small lie about car trouble and an emergency room visit for poor clumsy Jane, Beth walked away with keys to a SUV that Mrs Nedimyers’ son bought her for grocery trips. 

The kids were always enthusiastic to skip school, their eyes wide peering out the windows as though the world were different when they were at school. Beth smiled in the rearview at the girls as they whispered and laughed, Jane holding her dubby.

"Mommy."

"Yes, baby?" She smiled at Jane as she squirmed in her seat. 

"How much longer?"

"Soon, bear. We can use the bathrooms when we get there." The little girl was right on time for her customary potty break. 

Jane signed and stuck the corner of her blanket in her mouth as she peered out the window. 

"Jane. No eating the dubby." Beth gave her an exaggerated frowny face until she giggled and stopped sucking on the blanket. 

It was moments like that between her kids that were taking all of the dark clouds she was consumed with and lining them with silver. If the rest of her life was enjoying the extra time she spent with kids until the sun rose again, she could do it. 

It wouldn’t be the worst limbo imaginable. 

* * *

Jane and Emma were perched on the railing over the big cat exhibit, their wide eyes on the large black shape winding back and forth along the window. Beth stood behind them, her own gaze pinned to the sleek moving cat. It reminded her of Rio. The swagger of long limbs, sharp cheekbones and eyes to match. She could feel the intelligence and curiosity in its gaze, a look that had the hair rising on the nape of her neck like  he did.

"Mommy."

"Yes, dear." Beth blinked hard before glancing down at Jane. 

"Can we get ice cream?"

"And pizza!" Kenny chimed in as he and Danny joined them at the enclosure. They’d just finished looking at the gorilla exhibit, both boys flushed from the sun. 

"We always do, silly." Beth quipped, booping Jane on the nose while taking Danny’s hand. "Let’s stop at the bathrooms and gift shop first though. Emma needs her penguin keychain."

* * *

Beth watched her kids play in the arcade area of the pizza restaurant, their joyful smiles bringing her own lips up. She giggled as Jane danced in circles as the game spit out three tickets for her stack.

She’d learned more about her children’s individual personalities in the last several weeks of repeated days than she had their whole lives. Each were growing into wonderful humans and she thanked her lucky stars they were all her babies. 

"So, I hear Turner found your boy." Rio’s voice jolted her out of her reverie, his dark shape sliding into her peripheral vision. She wasn’t sure where she misstepped until she looked down at her phone, cursing her stupidity for forgetting to turn off her find a friend app that morning. 

Beth glared at him as he sat in the booth across from her, "He’s not _my boy_. He’s a disgusting rapist."

Rio’s eyes narrowed at her comment, his jaw rocking as he asked, "Whatchu mean?"

Shaking her head, she looked away from him and muttered, "It doesn’t matter. You’ve already decided what you want me to do and I’m not doing it."

"You think you know it all, ma."

She sighed tiredly, her eyes going to her kids but her gaze unfocused. "You have no idea what I know."

"I know you’re gonna drop all those babies off andm’gonna pick you up later, Elizabeth."

"Yeah, I know." Beth sighed, her blue eyes flicking to his shape sliding out of the booth and into the crowd. "You always do."

* * *

_ I see a bad moon a-rising _

_ I see trouble on the way _

_ I see earthquakes and lightnin' _

_ I see bad times today _

_ Don't go 'round tonight _

_ It's bound to take your life _

_ There's a bad moon on the rise _

After spending the last several dozen days with her children, Beth needed a day off. She’d woken as usual and when the brood were sent off to school she headed out. Sticking to the backroads, she wove her way out of the suburbs and into the city. 

After a quick stop at the bank to pick up a couple bags of cash at gunpoint, she headed to a parking garage to stash her minivan. Beth then walked two blocks to the luxury car dealership. She picked out the shiniest Mercedes with the most amenities, the clerk tripping over himself as she laid out enough stacks of cash to pay in full. 

The seats were buttery soft leather and every surface was lacquered walnut, polished to a impressive sheen.

"Let’s go for a drive, baby." She stroked the wheel and armrest affectionately before she finally pulled out of the parking lot. 

As the roads went from city to suburbs and into forest, Beth headed towards the border. She woke up with an urge for a road trip and some alone time. Every moment with her kids was cherished but everyone needed a break once in awhile. 

She synced her phone and chose an upbeat playlist, her fingers tapping and lips murmuring along to the words as she headed for Ontario. 

* * *

The spa was the top rated spot in the city bordering the river, it’s views of the waterfront unrivaled. Beth relaxed back into the plush leather recliner looking at the sun setting on the dark rippled surface, as a woman massaged and moisturized her calves. She wiggled her toes when the warm bubbles in the foot spa tickled the arches of her feet. The mani-pedi was her last stop before she would head for dinner in the luxury hotels five-star restaurant.

"What color are we thinking for your toes?" The salon attendant asked as she dried her feet off.   


"Something... classic."

"I’ve got just the thing."

* * *

  
Her newly painted red toes were highlighted by the peep toe heels she wore. The navy silk wrap dress clung to every curve of her body, the plunge of it showing off the barest of hints of the lacy things beneath. The soft curls in her strawberry blonde hair framed her pale skin and smoky eyes makeup. She looked and felt sexier than ever before as she stood in the elevator on her way downstairs for dinner. 

It’d been far too many days since she’d felt such relaxation, which is why she hadn’t noticed the two men flanking her as she walked through the lobby of the hotel. It was also why when they each gripped an elbow and steered her into the trunk of a black sedan she didn’t put up a fight. Beth was angry at herself for yet again being sniffed out by Rio and his boys. She mostly was pissed though that her entire day of stress relieving body treatments was being wasted as she bumped around the uncomfortable trunk space.

It was a couple hours before the hood was opened, the two kidnappers tugging her out of it without finesse. Beth grumbled in frustration as her new dress was damaged by the rough handling. 

"Great, this was brand new." She huffed, smoothing down the fabric that was snagged on the trunk latch.

" _Why hasn't he capped this bitch? "_ Beth stared at him with clenched teeth, the Spanish flowing between the men no longer foreign to her after so many days of audiobooks. 

" _No bitch’s worth gettin’ locked up for. Boss’ pussy whipped."_

The second man laughed gruffly as he leered down at her cleavage.  " _Don’t forget those big titties."_

  
  


* * *

Beth glared at Rio as he paced between Turner and her in the open spaced loft. She had such a different idea in mind for her evening and after enjoying her pampering all day, to end up right where she started, was infuriating.

"You look good, ma." Rio drawled with a slow smirk, his tongue darting out as his eyes roamed over her curves in the silk navy blue dress. "That new?"  


"It was new." Her words were snippy, as she swept her hand over the wrinkles. 

"Don’t worry, I got you somethin’ way better." He rasped, tipping that sharp jawline towards the bound FBI agent. 

"Why do you have to ruin everything?"

"Who me?" Rio chuckled with a boyish grin, his hand pressed against his chest. "You're always saying I don't help? That's me helping."

"You’re not helping, you’re trying to blackmail me. Like always."

"I’m trying to teach you to clean up your messes. He’s your problem. So, take care of it. Put those big girl panties on."

"Don’t say panties!" Beth huffed, crossing her arms under her chest as Rio laughed under his breath, his lazy stride moving towards her. 

"Why, it makin’ you wet, mami?"

"We’ve done this all before." She murmured softly, her retreating steps leading her into the kitchen. 

"Yeah, we keep goin’ in circles." He took a large step forward to corner her against the countertop. His gun was flat on the counter, his hands framing her hips.

"He knows your entire bag of tricks, what you do, who you are." His smile was smug as his tongue swiped over his bottom lip and he drove the threat home. "He even knows what makes your garden grow."

Beth rolled her eyes at his words, the fear of any of his threats long faded. 

"Oh. My bad. Yeah, I might've let that last one slip. Now, a guy like that can't let that slide." His chest brushed against hers, his scent filling her senses with nostalgia. She ached to return to the days they’d spent together, the few times he believed her and they’d tried to survive the sunrise. It never worked but she couldn’t help but try yet again to push against the boundaries of her circling existence. 

Rio rasped lowly in her ear but loud enough for Turner to hear. "How does that saying go? Cockle shells, silver bells, bodies all in a row?"

"Can we just... stop this, Rio?" She asked softly, her blue eyes rising to his dark hooded gaze. "I’ve lived it too many times and I can’t bear it."

"What you not a boss bitch anymore, baby?" He smirked, his head cocking back to peer down his nose at her. "You never learn, Elizabeth.  You keep thinkin’ cuz I been in you, that m’gonna cut you a break."

"I know you won’t." She hissed, her temper flaring up instantly as she pushed at his chest. "You’re too big of a selfish prick."

Rio’s hand flew to her neck, his fingers gripping the narrow curve firmly. "Watch your tone, Elizabeth."

"No." She peered up at him with a set jaw. "You’re gonna listen to me."

"Ma..."

"No." She snapped harshly. "I’ve been living this day over and over and over and I’m tired of doing this with you."

"Whatchu talkin’ about?"

"I’m stuck reliving this day. I wake every morning to September 18th and I can’t tell you how many times I’ve explained all of this to you."

"My boys pick you up from a bar, baby?" Rio drawled sarcastically, his eyes tracing her flushed face. 

"I’m tired of the blood." Beth’s teeth ground at the surge of pain she felt at the thought of all the past repeated evenings. "We all end up covered in it."

Rio’s eyes darkened at the comment, his hand cupping her throat firmly but not painfully. "You try to kill the king in these dreams, darlin?"

"I don’t try, I did." She yanked her body away from him, slapping away his reaching hands. "M’not doing it again."

"You actually believe this shit?"

"Believe it? I live it. I don’t know how many times it’s been. Enough times for me to learn Spanish.  _I can speak it almost as well as I can understand it. By the way, your boys think you’re whipped by my tight pussy and big tits."_

She smirked at the anger that flickered across his face before his eyes focused on the fact that she was speaking fluent Spanish. 

"It’s been long enough that I read every book on my bookcase, even the obscure sailing books Dean’s father gave us for Christmas five years ago. Ask me anything about clippers from the 15th century."

"Elizabeth."

" _Long_ enough to know everything there is to know about every taxonomic rank of every genus and species at the downtown zoo. I take my kids there every week. The  Panthera onca exhibit is my favorite. Its called a panther in other countries but it’s a jaguar in the Americas. It reminds me of you."

Tears blurred her eyes, "Sometimes I go there by myself and I watch it stalk the enclosure, back and forth and I feel at home. We’re both locked in cages. Every day is just another yesterday and I’m  tired."

Rio stared at her with something close to concern before it slid away to that cold indifference she hated most. He could cut her off from everything he was thinking with a blink of his eyes. It was one of his most frustrating qualities. 

"You deep in the bourbon , Ma?"

"Stop being a asshole." Beth snapped, her words choked off as he backed her into the kitchen island. 

"What I say about that tone, Elizabeth."

"You believed me once." She murmured as he stared down at her. "You took me to your spot and we waited for the sun to come up. You wanted to help. I thought it’d be different because you believed me but I fell asleep and voila same shit, same day."

Rio’s brow furrowed, his head cocking slightly, "My spot?"

"Yeah." Beth shrugged with a frustrated sigh, "the bridge. Out passed the old train depot. Your thinking spot."

He was stepping away from her so suddenly she felt off balance, her knees buckling until she braced her back against the countertop. 

Rio wiped a contemplative hand over his mouth and jaw, his dark eyes scanning her every nuance for a solid minute. "nobody knows about that place."

Beth opened her mouth to reply, but movement out of the corner of her eye caught both of their attentions. Turner had gotten loose, the occurrence of which that only happened once before, had slipped her mind. 

The pair struggled, Turner knocking Rio off balance with a heavy shoulder. Beth gasped as they fought, the gun going off once into the ceiling as hands grappled for control. 

"Rio." She cried out as the barrel was nearly pointed at his face. 

Turner yanked the weapon in his direction, trying to gain control, but Rio thwarted his attempts with a left punch to his ribs. Beth stepped towards them hoping to figure out what to do when the gun went off twice in rapid succession. 

The air seemed to be sucked out of the room in an instant. Beth’s lips parted with a sharp gasp before her body seemed to crumble in on itself. Her knees buckled and she folded unceremoniously to the hard wood floors. 

She blinked away the dark spots in her vision as she stared up at the lofts vaulted ceilings. 

There was the sound of a struggle and a grunt of pain before Rio’s voice was snarling out death threats and blackmail incentive. She couldn’t make out much, the pain splintering across her chest and ribs was too encompassing. 

Rio’s face appeared above her, his dark eyes angrier than she’d ever seen them. His large hand was suddenly pressing down on the wound, the pain ricochetting off her ribs and stomach. Beth moaned in pain, her hands weakling pushing at his wrist.

"Stay wit me, mami." He cupped her neck as she coughed up blood. "I got you."

"M’sorry." Her bloodied lips trembled as her fingers curled into his shirt. "I-I..t-tried to.. stop... I can’t st..." red spattered across Rio’s shirt and jaw. 

"Shit." Rio cursed, pressing on the pooling blood on her chest and shoulder. "Don’t talk. Just hold on, ma."

Beth struggled to breath with the pressure on her chest, her breathes coming in short pants. Rio shifted slightly, causing a surge of panic in her body. 

"don’t go."

"I ain’t goin’ nowhere."

"I didn’t want..." Beths words were wet and slurred without focus. "quit."

"What?"

"Dean." She coughed again, her lips speckled with blood. Black spots were fading the edges of her vision, the lack of oxygen and bloodloss slowing her heart beat. 

Rio was staring at her as she choked and gasped, a look of revelation in his eyes at her words. 

"My babies or you." She sobbed, before it turned to rough wet coughs. She’d died before in her repeats but never slowly and with painful clarity. Everything felt too real after so many days of monotony.

"Shh, Shh, it’s okay, darlin’. It’s okay." Rio’s voice cracked uncharacteristically while pressing down on her chest, blood seeping between his fingers.

Beth couldn’t speak her lips numb and throat full of tears and blood. She peered up at him with watery eyes, her mascara bleeding down her paling cheeks. Their eyes met and she finally saw behind the mask, a flash of something raw and real. 

"You ain’t just work, Elizabeth." He rasped lowly, his dark gaze intense. 

Her heart stuttered at his words, as her rough breathing became a choked gasp. Rio angled her body trying to keep her airway clear but soon darkness took over and she lost consciousness. 

* * *

_ I see a bad moon a-rising _

_ I see trouble on the way _

_ I see earthquakes and lightnin' _

_ I see bad times today _

_ Don't go 'round tonight _

_ It's bound to take your life _

_ There's a bad moon on the rise _

Beth’s eyes fluttered at the familiar song, her lids peeling open to look for her phone on the end table. Her vision was blurry though, the heavy feeling of exhaustion making her head thick and eyes scratchy. The images of the evening before flickered behind her lids as she tried to wake up. She remembered the pain that had bloomed across her chest and stomach, she could still feel it. The taste of copper was still on her tongue from coughing up blood, the flood of emotions still clogging her throat. She blinked away the heaviness in her lids until her vision finally cleared and she realized the end table didn’t contain her phone and the sound had ceased to exist. It was then that she let her gaze trail over the room to find the unfamiliar settings. 

The walls were no longer the taupe wallpaper that she painstakingly hung after buying it on sale from the designer home decor store downtown. The tall dresser that was more form than function wasn’t in its spot and the cream tapestry drapes were not framing the patio doors. The white walls and glass panel windows were that of a hospital, the machines next to her blinking numbers and dripping fluids into tubes connected to her body. 

Her heart kicked up as she tried to press herself upright in bed, the sound of it beeping loudly on the heart monitor next to her. A groan was torn from her throat as sharp, brilliant pain shot through her sternum and shoulder with the movement. 

"Easy, ma." A hoarse voice spoke from her right, shocking her more than the fact that she was waking up in a different location for the first time is so many days she lost track. 

Rio sat in a stiff backed chair near the edge of the hospital bed, his head cocked slightly as he looked her over with hooded eyes. He seemed tired, his eyes shadowed and jaw scruffy. It wasn’t a common look for him. The moment stretched silently, her gaze darting over his tense jaw and dark eyes while he stared back. 

She’d never thought she would get passed that horrible night. Beth thought she was doomed to live in the worst moment of her life, in a twisted limbo with no way out for all time. She’d lived and died on that day for so long she wouldn’t be surprised if it’d been years of her life.

Beth wasn’t sure what was different that evening to cause such a change. Maybe the right combination of things occured to reset fates path. Maybe she’d grown enough as a human to escape limbo. Maybe Rio and her had finally broken through some kind of personal barrier and they could both move forward. 

Beth had a feeling that she would never know but she found herself not wanting to question it. 

The only time she’d ever felt such overwhelming relief, while being in incredible pain, was after giving birth to four beautiful babies. Even that seemed to pale in comparison to what she felt in that moment staring at Rio at the start of a brand new day. It was though she, herself had just been reborn. 

"Hey." She rasped weakly, her eyes glassy as she swallowed back a sob."You’re here." 

"Yeah, mama." Rio replied, his voice a gravelly rasp in the quiet hospital room. He leaned forward in his chair, his scent filling her nose as his pinkie finger brushed hair from her temple and followed the curve of her cheek. 

He looked her over with warm eyes before he affirmed softly. "I’m here."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was so surprised at the response for this fic. Thank you all for reading and enjoying!


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